


Three Hours

by dbzkink



Category: Dragon Ball
Genre: Alien Biology, Alien Culture, Alien Sex, Anal, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Bottom Piccolo (Dragon Ball), Bottom Vegeta (Dragon Ball), Canon Compliant, Canon Temporary Character Death, Falling In Love, Family, First Kiss, First Love, First Meetings, First Time, First Time Bottoming, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Gay, Gay Sex, Hermaphrodite Piccolo (Dragon Ball), Love, Love Confessions, Love at First Sight, M/M, Mating, Mating Rituals, Multi, Origin Story, Resurrection, Shameless Smut, Smut, Three Hours instead of Three Years, Top Piccolo (Dragon Ball), Top Vegeta (Dragon Ball)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-23
Updated: 2021-03-02
Packaged: 2021-03-09 03:14:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 35,020
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27167110
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dbzkink/pseuds/dbzkink
Summary: When Vegeta and Nappa first come to Earth, the battle begins without Goku. When Vegeta calls a halt to the fighting to wait for Goku, Piccolo suggests they go off alone to go head to head during the three hours and maybe solve everything before Goku arrives. Vegeta agrees. They go head to head in a manner of speaking.
Relationships: Bulma Briefs/Piccolo/Vegeta, Piccolo/Vegeta (Dragon Ball)
Comments: 42
Kudos: 41





	1. Surprises

**Author's Note:**

> Graphic gay and alien sex ahead. My headcanon Piccolo has a whole biology, but he's a true biological hermaphrodite meaning he can reproduce as a male or a female, not in the pejorative sense long applied to intersex humans. If you are uncomfortable with alien sex, intersex stuff, or alien biology, you should probably skip this one.
> 
> While this is a completely stand alone fic, it is the backstory to [The Truth in the Shadows](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26162227/chapters/63656791). They might low-key spoiler each other, but they're really separate stories. I wanted to write the backstory anyway and then I got one request and that was all it took XD.
> 
> I intended for this to be little more than a one-shot, but I got carried away. Sorry. I'm bad at short things.

After how hideous the first Saiyan had been, and the bald monstrosity, Piccolo almost had to pick his jaw up off the ground when the third one appeared from behind the dumb mustached brute. The short one was all intelligent eyes and chiseled jawline and sexy smirk, with that fang winking out. Not as long or dangerous as the ones in Piccolo’s mouth, but he imagined the Saiyan’s were sharp. Piccolo’s mind filled with a brief, vivid fantasy of running his tongue along them as he kissed that small, smug, sexy man.

As if the guy heard Piccolo’s thoughts, his eyes slid to Piccolo, one eyebrow arching up, adding even more sexy to that already dangerously sexy face. The small one’s dark, intense eyes crawled up the length of Piccolo’s body and said, “Well, well, a Namek on Earth. That explains how Raditz got his ass kicked.”

“You’ll get your ass kicked soon enough,” Piccolo said, eye-fucking the man as a lopsided smile split his face.

“Want me to kill the Namek, Vegeta? He’s got a smart mouth on him,” the big galoot said.

Vegeta. Piccolo could imagine moaning that name, roaring that name, begging and pleading that name, but instead of spending his time checking out the smaller one, he met the big one’s eyes. The big one had a flash of fear, but his bluster quickly returned. Piccolo snarled, “You won’t get rid of me that easily.”

“No, Nappa, don’t kill that one. We’ll need him for information about the dragon balls,” Vegeta said and did a little of his own eye-fucking. Piccolo met his dark gaze and they stared into one another for a brief moment before the fighting began.

When the little sexy asshole freed the green monsters, Piccolo managed to focus some, but the little one didn’t have to fight. It was maddening to feel his eyes on Piccolo. To turn and see that damned smirk, the tightly crossed, muscular arms, and the mien of complete confidence. That man knew he wasn’t going to die at the hands of anyone on Earth. It almost made Piccolo hard to see such open, delighted arrogance and villainy. What would it be like to fuck someone that powerful? That sure of himself?

Piccolo took a massive hit while distracted by Saiyan dick. Hard not to be though, the little one looked like he knew how to fuck. Piccolo was sick of humans. They were so fragile and had so little stamina. It got boring fast. And Goku…fucking Goku. Goku was strong enough to at least garner Piccolo’s sexual notice, but Piccolo had never met someone so physically attractive that stirred absolutely zero lust in Piccolo.

The fight wore on and things were looking dire for Piccolo, as well as the idiots he had to team up with, three of whom were already dead. Piccolo tried to get his whiny protégé and Krillin to pull their shit together. Piccolo wanted to at least hold out until Goku arrived. Goku might save their asses, but only if Piccolo’s crew stopped being cowards.

The little muscle-bound warlord surprised Piccolo when he called a halt to the fight. Vegeta said, his eyes sparkling, “We’ll give you a reprieve. I want to see this ‘Goku’ myself. Three hours. That’s it.”

Vegeta tapped something on the device on his face. Piccolo thought for a moment he imagined the way Vegeta inclined his head at Piccolo, the way he bit his lower lip sensually as he smiled at Piccolo. But then Vegeta very blatantly let his eyes crawl up over Piccolo again and subtly shifted his narrow hips enough that Piccolo could see a growing bulge in the tight blue pants.

Piccolo swallowed hard. If he was going to die this day, he’d prefer to go out with a bang, so to speak. “Hey, you, yeah, you,” Piccolo bit out, pointing at Vegeta when Vegeta’s eyes narrowed and his smile grew.

“Oh, you mean little old me?” the little fuck said, feigning innocence when Piccolo got a sudden whiff of the smell of arousal coming off the man. Gods he smelled good.

“Yeah, you tiny motherfucker, come with me, away from my…uh…friends…Let’s you and me go at it, but make your big, dumb partner agree that if I annihilate you, he leaves.”

“Oh, I do love to go head to head. I’ve only experienced weak Nameks, so you might prove briefly entertaining. Very well. Nappa! If this one ends me, you go back to Frieza with your tail between your legs,” Vegeta said, as he blinked slowly and turned back to Piccolo.

“Aw, come on, boss, let me kill these ones while you kill that one!” the big, bald idiot whined.

“Now, now, Nappa, that wouldn’t be very sporting. Do as I say or you’ll answer to me once I’ve put this one down. He needs to go down badly,” Vegeta said and canted his head with another big, fanged smile as his eyes slid from Piccolo down suggestively, as if he were inviting Piccolo to take a gander at his cock. Which Piccolo was more than happy to do. Definitely half-hard.

“You’ll be begging on your belly soon enough, little man,” Piccolo said, trying not to laugh.

“Let’s see if you think I’m so little once I have you on your knees, Namek!” Vegeta snarled, but Piccolo could see the mirth in his eyes.

“Are you coming, you arrogant prick?” Piccolo said, taking off.

Once Vegeta was in the air, on his trail, he chuckled and purred, “No, not yet.”

Piccolo looked over his shoulder and laughed. Vegeta slammed into him as Piccolo dropped down near the waterfall where he liked to meditate, far enough away that they’d have some time if any of the idiots they’d left behind got it in their heads to come “help” while Piccolo and Vegeta “fought.”

He yanked Piccolo’s gi top off. Vegeta pinned Piccolo’s big hands over his head and growled, “Pretty big talk back there, Namek. You think you can best the Prince of All Saiyans now that we’re head to head?” The man rubbed his hardening cock against Piccolo’s through the fabric of their pants. His sexy smirk was intoxicating. Piccolo didn’t want to wait to kiss it off his face, but he would.

“Don’t know, do I know the Prince of All Saiyans?” Piccolo said, rolling his hips up against Vegeta’s.

“Not yet, you don’t,” Vegeta hissed. He sat up long enough to toss off his armor. He peeled off his tight shirt.

“Sweet fucking gods,” Piccolo breathed, not even meaning to speak aloud. Vegeta’s body was unbelievable. Cut and golden and scarred. Piccolo wanted to suck every inch of him. He smelled even better too, now that there was nothing in the way.

Vegeta chortled and bent to nip along Piccolo’s jawline. He growled, “You might find you know the Prince of All Saiyans rather well by the end of our little sparring match.”

“You make a habit of speaking about yourself in the third person?” Piccolo teased, his grin growing even wider.

“Oh fuck you, you smart-mouthed bastard,” Vegeta said, smirking, “You asked if I was coming, and I’m still not. Very disappointing from all your talk of me begging on my belly.”

“Maybe you better start begging me to fuck you right into the ground,” Piccolo purred and curled up. He bit Vegeta’s earlobe, swirled his tongue inside the shell, and whispered, “But I’m open to other suggestions. I want it to be a fair fight, after all. I don’t need any special treatment.”

Vegeta kept Piccolo’s hands pinned as he bent, his lips hovering over Piccolo’s and murmured, “Mmm…but you might get special treatment anyway.”

“You think I can’t take you?” Piccolo growled, a little half-smile escaping his control.

“You’ll have to prove that you can take me, more than once, I fear. I’m hard to convince,” Vegeta said and finally let his mouth crush Piccolo’s. His tongue drove into Piccolo’s mouth like he was fucking it. Piccolo’s tongue met Vegeta’s and they panted for breath together as they tasted the other’s mouth.

Piccolo groaned, wrestled his hands free, and threaded his claws through the wild flame of black hair. He pulled them together tighter and their hips bucked frantically toward one another, hard pricks grinding. Piccolo pulled briefly out of the kiss to meet Vegeta’s eyes. Piccolo’s widened and he said, “What the fuck?” before he shoved down Vegeta’s pants. “Fucking gods, Vegeta! Where were you keeping that?”

Vegeta cackled and kissed Piccolo roughly back into the soft, spring grass. He shoved Piccolo’s pants down too, Piccolo lifting his ass, and Vegeta on his hips, off the ground to make it easier. Vegeta said, “Have I managed to surprise you, Namek? Do you have a name?”

“Yeah, you could say that. For fuck’s sake, you’re so short!”

“Well, everyone is short next to you, you green behemoth. And next to that fucking nitwit, Nappa.”

“Still, though, it’s unfair that your cock is bigger than mine,” Piccolo said, a little nervous about the monster dick Vegeta kept hidden in his battle suit.

“See if you think it’s unfair after I’ve shown you how well I use it,” Vegeta murmured and kissed Piccolo more, nipped his lower lip.

“Yeah? You think I’m gonna let you fuck my ass with that thing?” Piccolo said, almost giggling. He _would_ let Vegeta fuck his ass with that glorious prick, but not right then. Vegeta would have to work for that. Work up to that. Piccolo laughed more, still in shock.

Vegeta shoved Piccolo’s legs wide and said, “Mmm…not right this moment, any battle starts with some testing of the waters, seeing where one’s opponent’s strengths lie…” He bent his head and licked up the ribbed, pink underbelly of Piccolo’s cock. Piccolo smirked as Vegeta’s eyelids fell heavy, clearly reconsidering who would be fucking whom first. Vegeta sucked on Piccolo’s tip, but then kissed back down Piccolo’s length. He mouthed each of Piccolo’s balls for a bit, groaning out, “Fuck…you smell godsdamned divine…”

“Well, I am a god,” Piccolo said, running his fingers through Vegeta’s mane again. It was so unexpectedly soft. Piccolo wondered what the man’s tail would feel like. It had flitted out of Piccolo’s way when he’d worked Vegeta’s pants off his hips and over his big dick.

Vegeta chuckled, slid his hands under Piccolo’s ass, and hoisted him up. He purred, “Fighting stance, get those legs wide, Namek, since you won’t tell me your fucking name…”

“I might, if you show you’re worthy to utter it,” Piccolo said, grinning when Vegeta gave him another licentious eye-brow raise. Piccolo continued, “Maybe once I see how skilled your mouth is.”

Piccolo didn’t mind a good rim-job, but it felt alarmingly intimate for someone that he was banging on a whim. Although if Piccolo was honest with himself, the initial, white-hot physical attraction he’d felt for the small Saiyan was morphing into something different at an alarming rate. Piccolo was oddly at ease with the snarky little man. Oddly…entranced. Like he wished they had more than three hours to thoroughly ravage each other. Like he wished they could lounge around talking afterwards.

“Holy shit, what are you doing!?” Piccolo cried, ripped out of his unfortunately affectionate reverie as Vegeta’s mouth went where his mouth wasn’t supposed to go. How had Vegeta even known?

“Eating out your _theadur_?” Vegeta said, pulling back. The statement sounded like a question, which made Piccolo soften toward the man as the bioluminescent glow faded from Piccolo’s skin.

“Uh…okay…so, I take it you’ve fucked other Nameks pretty, um, intimately. Oh shit, please tell me you didn’t _theadur-_ rape a Namek,” Piccolo said, but he couldn’t imagine Vegeta raping someone. He didn’t know why, the man was clearly brutal.

Vegeta’s sour expression of distaste was all the answer Piccolo needed. “Good gods, no, that would be a most repugnant act. I know what a _theadur_ signifies. But do you? Growing up here, estranged from your people? You didn’t even know what you were until a couple hours ago,” Vegeta said, flaring a nostril. As he finished speaking, he languidly took Piccolo’s cock in his mouth, deep-throating Piccolo with such zeal that Piccolo cried out.

“Fuck! Oh fuck!” Piccolo panted for a moment, collected his thoughts and said, “Uh, yeah, instinctually I know. It’s how I mate. How I get pregnant. What are you talking about? Is there more to it?”

Vegeta let Piccolo’s prick pop out of his mouth. Saliva glistened on his swollen lips. He said, “I’ve never touched a _theadur_ but I have fucked a Namek in his ass, _consensually_ , you asshole. I’m not a rapist—“

“Just a genocidal murderer?” Piccolo quipped.

“Exactly, the two should not be confused,” Vegeta said and slurped Piccolo down again into the anatomically confusing depths of his throat.

The tensing and relaxing of Vegeta’s throat muscles felt incredible on Piccolo’s head and he gasped, “Stop! Fuck, you have to stop or I’m going to—“

Vegeta mouth-fucked Piccolo deeper somehow, using his hand to pump the portion of Piccolo’s shaft that the little man couldn’t fit in his mouth. Piccolo had no idea where Vegeta was putting him. Piccolo gasped and clutched at Vegeta and filled the Saiyan’s mouth with his cum. Vegeta sucked less vigorously through Piccolo’s aftershocks and slid off at just the right moment, when Piccolo became hypersensitive.

“Fucking hell, Vegeta!” Piccolo gasped and Vegeta kissed up Piccolo’s body, moving as lithely as a panther, pausing to suck the life out of both of Piccolo’s nipples until he was groaning again.

“Mmm…now perhaps your dick won’t distract you from our conversation. It’s so rare I meet someone who doesn’t immediately piss me off or bore me to tears. Where have you been my whole life?”

“Getting my ass kicked by Goku on this weird fucking planet,” Piccolo said with a snort.

“Oh? He’s good, then?” Vegeta said, but he sounded perfunctorily curious as he kissed over Piccolo’s body, his other hand busily roaming over the different textures of Piccolo’s skin.

Piccolo grumbled, “Unfortunately. Fucking dumb-ass though. Gods I just want to punch his jovial face every time I see it.”

“Yet you helped him murder my kin?” Vegeta said against Piccolo’s throat as he licked and nipped up to Piccolo’s ear.

“Yeah, lucky for you or you wouldn’t be wetting your lips with Namek cum. Your fucking hirsute kin was going to destroy my planet. Uneasy alliances are sometimes struck in such wild, hairy times.”

Vegeta snorted out a little laugh. “Ah yes, Raditz’s hair was a sight to behold. Poor bastard. Who knew there would be someone on this backwater capable of ending a Saiyan warrior? A hot someone. With a ribbed cock.”

“I’m glad to have that one-up on your ridiculously disproportionate prick.”

“It’s proportional to my ego,” Vegeta said and lowered his head to kiss Piccolo.

Piccolo lifted his head to meet Vegeta’s kiss. Piccolo’s cheeks felt tired because he’d been smiling almost nonstop since they flew off together. “What are you made of? You weigh like six-hundred pounds,” Piccolo wheezed beneath Vegeta as he settled in on Piccolo’s chest.

“The same mortal shit as the rest of life in the universe. Why don’t you want me to touch your sheath?” Vegeta said as he brushed the back of his fingers along Piccolo’s cheek. The way Vegeta closed his eyes reminded Piccolo of the way tigers blinked after a good meal. Terrifying, but temporarily harmless.

Piccolo wasn’t sure how to answer. Vegeta aroused some confusing feelings in Piccolo, so he said, “Well…I…It’s just that no one has before. It’s…I don’t know…somewhere in the roots of my brain it feels powerful. Sacred even. It’s…it’s a thing for mates. Not casual fucks.”

Vegeta nodded and said, “Indeed, that’s why I want to fuck you there. Put a baby in you.”

Piccolo was rendered speechless. Vegeta stared at him without fear of rejection or any second guessing of his own desires. Piccolo spluttered, once his voice returned, “Y…wh…I…Did…did you just say what I think you said?”

“It depends what you think I said. I thought Nameks had excellent hearing,” Vegeta said with a coy smile and kissed Piccolo more, rutting on his hip, and he panted, “I want to mate with you. I wouldn’t have flown off with some moron who was only hot piece of ass. I’m not that desperate. I can get laid anywhere, anytime, but you…you smell different. You feel different. I feel it. In my gut. In my tail,” Vegeta growled the last bit and sucked his way down Piccolo’s neck. “Life is full of uncertainty, but I have no uncertainty about you.”


	2. Animal Truths

Piccolo searched his own heart. His own soul. Vegeta, in only a few minutes, had stirred more feelings in Piccolo than the rest of his liaisons combined. Piccolo ached at the thought of Vegeta disappearing and leaving Earth without Piccolo; at the thought of Goku, the fucking clown, beating Vegeta. But Piccolo didn’t think that was likely. Piccolo said, “So, you’ll mate with me, murder me, conquer Earth, and head out?”

“So depressing, my heart,” Vegeta said with a scowl, but continued, “I won’t murder you. It will go easier for both of us if we keep our relationship private until after I’ve annihilated Kakarot. What with your whiny friends and my annoying comrade, it would just be simpler to not inform them. Then, once the dust has settled and the blood has dried, you can take Nappa’s pod, and I mine, and we’ll make our fortune in the universe. I can make you happy. Keep you safe. There’s few who can best me, and not for long. Especially if I use the dragon balls.”

“They die with me, you know,” Piccolo said and wondered why he wasn’t more surprised or indignant at Vegeta’s vision of their future.

“I do know. It’s how I realized that the Namekian wishing orbs were not just a myth. Between the ones here and those, we could both be immortal in short order. But you’re evading my proposition even after I’ve sucked your cock,” Vegeta said and looked more put out than Piccolo thought was warranted for what was essentially a marriage proposal, but magic, after fifteen minutes and a blow job.

“Vegeta…seriously? I mean, I get it if you just want a novel fuck, but you don’t have to bullshit about your reasoning. I’m obviously going to die today, so I see no reason not to have a fun last hurrah—“

“What?! You’re not dying today…godsdamnit, it is very frustrating not to know my mate’s name! What is your name?”

“Your mate? Really?” Piccolo said, raising an eyebrow.

“Can’t you feel it?” Vegeta asked, looking genuinely perplexed. He rocked on Piccolo’s hip again and wrapped his calloused hand around Piccolo’s cock which was as hard as if it hadn’t just gotten an excellent blow-job.

“Feel what?” Piccolo asked and he was perplexed enough for both of them.

“Name first.”

“Gods, fine! Piccolo,” Piccolo said.

“Piccolo…” Vegeta smirked and kissed Piccolo more. Vegeta shifted between Piccolo’s legs. “Piccolo…” Vegeta tongued the cleft of Piccolo’s pecs before he suckled each nipple again. “Piccolo…” Vegeta hummed. His tongue trailed over the hills and valleys of Piccolo’s abdomen. He licked his way down Piccolo’s cock and his balls, back onto Piccolo’s _theadur_. “Piccolo…can’t you hear it? Can’t you hear the call of your body to be with mine? Don’t deny us.”

Vegeta’s hot tongue spread wide over the hidden slit opening of Piccolo’s _theadur_. Faint bioluminescent light flared under Piccolo’s skin, pulsing out from his _theadur_. Piccolo couldn’t deny that it absolutely felt _right_ to have Vegeta touching him there. That Piccolo’s core throbbed to be filled by Vegeta. Maybe Piccolo’s baser, more animal brain had been tainted by Earthling socialization. Because when he only heeded the primal part of himself, it craved Vegeta. It howled for him.

“Spin that fine ass around, Vegeta, I want to show you the best thing about Namek jaws.”

Vegeta’s tongue pulsed against Piccolo. A _theadur_ required force to open, so Vegeta’s tongue didn’t go inside Piccolo, but the pressure was delicious. Dark, intense eyes met Piccolo’s. Vegeta gave a happy grunt and shifted until his thick, beautiful cock was above Piccolo’s face. Piccolo palmed Vegeta’s ass cheeks. Good gods, it just wasn’t fair how much of Vegeta’s body was completely flawless. Piccolo ran his hands appreciatively over the lean, tight hips, back over that round, firm ass, and down the muscular thighs that trembled in anticipation on either side of Piccolo’s head.

Vegeta’s dick might’ve had some length and girth on Piccolo, but Piccolo smirked about his own anatomical advantages. Piccolo unfurled his tongue and coiled it around Vegeta’s cock. Piccolo’s tongue was elastic to the point that he could stretch it to absurd lengths while maintaining muscle control. It was like a prehensile tail that could shrink and fit nicely in his mouth, allowing the appearance of having a normal, human-style tongue.

“Fucking gods!” Vegeta yelped and he arched up like a cat to be able to peer back at Piccolo with wide eyes. “You saw my cock and raised me a ridiculous tongue—“

Piccolo spiraled his lengthened tongue up and down Vegeta’s cock, dancing the tip over his balls, then he retracted the whole thing and said, “I told you I don’t need any special treatment to best the Prince of All Saiyans.”

Vegeta smirked before he shifted and licked Piccolo’s _theadur’s_ exterior again before he purred, “The Namek I fucked did _not_ have _that_. It seems I’ll be the one getting special treatment.”

Piccolo chuckled before twisting his tongue around Vegeta’s cock as he slid most of Vegeta’s length deep into his mouth, unhinging his jaw like a snake, so that Vegeta cried out again in surprise. Piccolo enjoyed his little triumph, knowing that the Prince of All Saiyans thought he was pretty good at sucking dick. And he was, Piccolo had no complaints, but Piccolo’s dick-sucking wasn’t even the same sport as Vegeta’s, or anyone else’s for that matter.

“Fucking gods, Piccolo!” Vegeta screamed as Piccolo’s tongue coiled up and down the length of his shaft while Piccolo used his exceptionally pliant mouth to suck hard. Piccolo sometimes regretted that he didn’t really want to suck his own dick, because he was _amazing_ at it.

Vegeta’s body shuddered as Piccolo worked his cock. At first Vegeta kept trying to go down on Piccolo, so Piccolo’s skin blinked on and off like a guttering lightbulb, but it wasn’t long until Vegeta gave himself over to pleasure entirely and his upper body collapsed onto Piccolo. He rested his head, with it velvety-soft flame of hair, on Piccolo’s thigh that was splayed out to the side.

Piccolo used his alien mouth to take Vegeta to the brink of orgasm, then pulled off completely. Vegeta returned to licking his _theadur_ and Piccolo returned to sucking Vegeta’s cock. They went through that cycle until, to Piccolo’s victorious pleasure, Vegeta panted and screamed and pleaded, “Oh gods, Piccolo, please, fuck, please, please, please, give me release!”

Piccolo gave him a final firm tug with his tongue as he sucked hard, and Vegeta’s cum spilled into his mouth, voluminous and hot, sweeter than any giz Piccolo had ever tasted. Vegeta groaned and bucked into his mouth, clutching his thigh and kissing it, and he gasped, “Gods, please, I need you to be mine. Please…”

Piccolo slowly reeled in his tongue and set Vegeta’s cock free, letting his jaw snap back into the socket. Vegeta gave a piteous little whimper as Piccolo ran his powerful tongue up the underside of Vegeta’s cock one last time. Piccolo turned and kissed the inside of Vegeta’s thighs, slid his hands back up to grip the prince’s ass.

Vegeta turned around like an injured man, but stayed on all fours, searching Piccolo’s eyes. “Yes?”

“Fuck it, why not?” Piccolo said and shrugged.

Vegeta’s face scrunched up in a scowl and he said, obviously wounded, “ _That’s_ your response to becoming my mate?”

“Hmm…you want me to do better?” Piccolo grinned and said in a breathy voice, “Please, Prince Vegeta, please do me the honor of fucking my sacred sheath so that we can be joined as one forever, which will probably last about three hours, in my case. Take me, I’m yours, oh mighty Prince.”

Vegeta frowned and grumped, “So flippant. Would you choose this if not for your belief in your imminent demise?”

“Vegeta…” Piccolo flexed his abs and met Vegeta’s mouth hungrily. “If I answer the animal part of myself, then yes, breed the fuck out of me, I want to get fucked by you until I can’t walk and be entirely yours. But if I listen to the rational part of myself, none of it matters, you and your idiot comrade are so much stronger than me, that I’m gonna die soon.”

“I’m not mating with you if you wouldn’t choose it regardless of circumstances,” Vegeta said and sat back on his haunches. His hands caressed up and down the inside of Piccolo’s thighs, his thumbs brushing Piccolo’s _theadur’s_ slit every time they reached his crotch. Just enough to send a shiver of green light blooming under his skin. Vegeta murmured, more to himself, Piccolo thought, “Fuck, you’re perfection” as his eyes devoured Piccolo.

Piccolo stared at Vegeta. Vegeta’s eyes snapped up and met his. Piccolo could see the whole of their lives sprawling out before him in different branches: them bloodied and battered, waging war on foreign planets; them lounging contentedly in this very grass while their hoard of powerful young splashed and played in the waterfall; something in between where they fought when they needed to, loved when they could, but made a family together, strong, self-sufficient children that would love them and surpass them in strength. The desire for any of those things, all of those things, filled Piccolo’s bones like warm, tingling new marrow. 

Ever since taking Gohan to train, Piccolo realized that he wanted to be a father one way or another. Gohan was his son in his heart, if not biologically. The thought of his very own biological children made Piccolo’s eyes fill with happy tears.

Piccolo, for the first time, took Vegeta seriously. He said, “You mean it, don’t you?”

“Of course I mean it,” Vegeta said, harrumphing and crossing his arms. “It’s insulting that you won’t just evaluate your feelings and decide. Don’t Nameks just know?”

Piccolo started to speak. Stopped. Thought. Yes. He supposed he did know. He sat up and straddled Vegeta’s lap. He held Vegeta’s recalcitrant face in his hands and tried to kiss him. Vegeta kept his mouth stubbornly closed, so Piccolo’s tongue slipped along the seam of his lips. Gradually, Vegeta succumbed and his arms wrapped around Piccolo’s chest. “Please…please, Piccolo? I know you feel it. The universe brought me here, of all ridiculous places. I didn’t know why until I saw you. Nothing good has ever happened in my life until now. Please…”

“Yeah, you hot little bastard, yeah, I do know, if I’m honest with myself. I just feel…weird…that I know.”

“You’ve been around these human vermin too long. Let your instincts carry you, my heart,” Vegeta whispered and kissed Piccolo deeply.

Piccolo let go of his Earthling beliefs about partnership and romance. Fiery love roared through his veins and he crushed Vegeta in his embrace. The loneliness and the emptiness and the hunger for something unknowable that had all plagued Piccolo his entire life were incinerated as he gave in to what he really was, who he really was, even if he’d never understood until that moment. Vegeta’s touch lit more flames on his skin and his mouth more inside his belly, the heat pooling like magma waiting for Vegeta to release it before Piccolo exploded from his want.

Vegeta smiled against Piccolo’s lips and growled, “That’s more like it. Now will you let me do what I want to your body? There’s so much of it and yet you’re so stingy.”

Piccolo chuckled as Vegeta kissed down his neck and laid Piccolo back in the grass. “Do you thrive on being an asshole?”

“Mmm…It has mostly served me well…” Vegeta said and put Piccolo’s thighs over his shoulder. “You might domesticate me with that tongue of yours. But maybe you won’t find mine so terrible.” Vegeta pressed his tongue flat against Piccolo’s sheath as he held Piccolo’s ass up off the ground.

Vegeta’s tongue was a marvelous organ. Piccolo wanted to tease Vegeta a little, really make him work for it. Vegeta’s eyes rose up to meet Piccolo’s as a little burst of chi rippled through his tongue. The buzzing, vibrating zing made Piccolo gasp and basically hump Vegeta’s face. Vegeta’s smirk was visible even as he continued to course his tongue up and down the slit.

Vegeta took a deep breath and then in time with the rippling chi attack, thrust his tongue into Piccolo’s velvety sheath. The billions of nerves that lived in that soft lining made Piccolo scream, “Vegeta, holy fucking shit!” Piccolo’s skin blazed with bright, bioluminescent light.

Vegeta hummed happily against Piccolo. Vegeta began tongue-fucking Piccolo, the tip of his tongue curling up with such force that it ran along a lot of the nerves that connected with the base of Piccolo’s cock. When he added a constant, low stream of chi to his tongue, making the damn thing vibrate non-stop, Piccolo gasped and wailed and tried to resist coming so soon. Piccolo rarely masturbated in his sheath and it had been a long time since he had touched himself that way. Resistance proved futile as his climax slammed into him.

The muscles of his sheath seized and pulled at Vegeta’s tongue, yanking on it as they rippled, moving everything they could reach toward Piccolo’s core as he moaned and clutched handfuls of Vegeta’s wild hair. His _theadur’s_ orgasm was so powerful that his balls answered the twitching and vibrating delight that Vegeta had caused there by splattering Piccolo with cum all the way onto his face. He didn’t even care because the pleasure was relentless as Vegeta plunged his magic, buzzing tongue deeper into Piccolo.

Piccolo screamed like he was dying as Vegeta pulled a second orgasm out of Piccolo. Vegeta unspooled all the tangled heat in Piccolo’s belly that came from their kissing and banter. Piccolo, like an idiot, gasped, “Oh fuck, I love you,” and hoped it wouldn’t freak Vegeta out. Piccolo had never said those words, but humans often lost their shit if the words were uttered before the recipient was ready. It confused Piccolo why one couldn’t just express their feelings without any expected response or reciprocation. Maybe Saiyans were less stupid.

“ _Vk karam oon, vku-tseeka_ ,” Vegeta murmured against Piccolo’s still tingling sheath as he pulled his tongue free. His eyes found Piccolo’s again and he gave Piccolo’s ass a firm smack as he lowered his hips back to the grass.

“What the fuck does _that_ mean?” Piccolo said, feeling vulnerable now that he’d admitted his feelings to Vegeta, to the universe, to himself.

Vegeta climbed above Piccolo's body again and started rubbing their cocks together after scraping up a bunch of Piccolo’s cum to use as lube. Piccolo’s dick didn’t seem to register its orgasms, as it zealously stayed hard to press against Vegeta’s Saiyan-stamina prick.

“Oh fucking gods, Vegeta…” Piccolo moaned as Vegeta licked up the remaining cum-trail up onto Piccolo’s chin. Only once Piccolo was clean did Vegeta kiss his mouth. Piccolo tasted himself on Vegeta’s tongue and groaned more. Vegeta had ruined him anyway. There was no alternative to mating with this little man because he could never want another. Not that Piccolo wanted an alternative: he was simply relieved that he’d agreed to mating with Vegeta already so he didn’t have to beg for it.

Vegeta pulled away from the kiss and said, “Hmm…I think it means the same as your ‘I love you,’ and I called you my mate: _vku-tseeka_. Yes. I’m sure of it. It means ‘I love you.’ It’s reserved for mates and offspring. I’ve experienced other cultures that don’t distinguish levels of affection. It is possible to care deeply about a comrade, but not like this. This is…existential.”

Piccolo’s thoughts clouded as Vegeta frotted the fuck out of him. “Vegeta…fucking hell…you’re gonna make me come again if you keep that up.”

“Mmm…I know,” Vegeta said and his smug smile warmed Piccolo’s heart.

Vegeta’s tail lashed behind him. It felt to Piccolo like it was waiting for something. Piccolo grazed his claws over Vegeta’s scalp, petting his little mate, and earning a happy hum. Piccolo said, “Is your tail as soft as your hair?”

“Hmm? Oh, you’ll feel it soon enough, my heart.”

“It’s kind of cute that you call me that,” Piccolo said and curled up to kiss Vegeta more. 

“You’re kind of cute as well,” Vegeta said and chuckled. He rolled his hips in such a way that the head of his cock rumbled up the ridges on the underside of Piccolo’s cock. It felt incredible, but Piccolo wanted to have some self-control. This was a skirmish in their battle and Piccolo wanted to win more than one, even when losing was so sweet.

“Mmm…it’s not worth it, _vku-karam_ , you can’t overpower me,” Vegeta whispered as he suckled Piccolo’s earlobe before tongue fucking his ear.

His tongue pulsed in Piccolo’s ear and Vegeta’s relentless cock rubbed Piccolo’s, bringing every nerve to life. Piccolo’s whole pelvis throbbed and he panted, “Vegeta…”

“I love the sound of my name on your lips. Your fangs on your lower lip make me want to kiss you until I bleed. Come for me, _vku-tseeka_ , I demand it.”

“Bossy motherfucker,” Piccolo growled. Piccolo held himself together one moment longer to gasp, “Come with me, baby.”

“Yes…” Vegeta moaned and their cocks twitched and trembled together as their semen coated them in hot, wet streaks, mingled together so perfectly, Piccolo felt like they were briefly one body. As Vegeta arched up his back to tuck his hips to rub tighter against Piccolo’s prick a final few times, he pleaded, “Can I take you? You’re mine? _Vkai_?”


	3. The Heart Wants

Piccolo stared into Vegeta’s intense eyes while he evaluated his own heart. There was no denying it, even in the brief reprieve of lust after so much pleasure. Piccolo only wanted Vegeta more, whether it was insane or not, it was the truth. Piccolo panted out, “Yeah, fuck yeah, fuck me rough, Vegeta. I need you!”

Vegeta bit out a fast string of Saiyan and adjusted himself. “Gods, you’re fucking gorgeous, Piccolo,” he purred as he fingered Piccolo and scissored his fingers to open up Piccolo’s _theadur_. 

Piccolo trembled just from that small touch, but he felt so exposed, having Vegeta do what he was doing, looking inside Piccolo. But to hear Vegeta describe him that way was such a turn-on. Piccolo feared he would only last a few thrusts before he gave himself over to the endless orgasm in Saiyan form that stared into his core like it was the only thing he ever wanted to see. 

Piccolo snarled, “Vegeta, fuck, stop teasing me!”

Vegeta’s little smirk made Piccolo smirk back helplessly. Vegeta drove his cock into Piccolo’s sheath and dove to kiss him. Vegeta sank his prick up to the hilt in one smooth thrust. The kiss was frantic as Vegeta held Piccolo's jaw with one hand, but kept his weight off Piccolo with his other arm. He snapped his hips harder and harder until the air around them stirred with the chi that rippled off both men.

Piccolo always topped when he fucked humans, so he’d never been fucked in any manner. The experience was shockingly hot. It felt so intimate to allow Vegeta to put his cock inside Piccolo at all, but in a part of Piccolo that had never been touched by another was intense beyond all his fantasies. Tears filled Piccolo’s eyes and he turned his face away from Vegeta to hide them, but Vegeta tipped it back and kissed Piccolo’s eyelids.

Vegeta purred, “ _Vk oon karam_ , _minaiya._ I love you. Don’t ever hide from me. You are my only.”

Piccolo kept his eyes closed for a long moment, savoring the intense, if terrifying, pleasure and connection with his new mate, until he felt a hot, wet splash on his cheek. Piccolo opened his eyes to see that Vegeta’s eyes were brimming with tears too. Piccolo realized he’d been clutching handfuls of grass to anchor himself to reality as they made love. He let go and palmed Vegeta’s ass with one hand and wrapped his arm around Vegeta’s neck with the other, kissing him more fiercely. His fangs dragged along Vegeta’s lower lip and Piccolo tasted the copper zing of his mate’s blood.

“I love you, Vegeta,” Piccolo gasped as he regained control of his body enough to meet Vegeta’s powerful, fast thrusts. 

Vegeta’s face shifted into ecstasy and he murmured, “ _Oon soqve ya vku-minai, jaival ren vku-rulvek, amana ren vku-colfti. Vku-tseeka, vku-sot, vku-aiya._ ”

“Vegeta, gods, no fair, I don’t speak Saiyan. What the fuck does that mean?” Piccolo said and flipped Vegeta onto his back. He sat on Vegeta’s hips and pounded down on him, groaning at the new angle. “Fuck, your cock is life, baby!”

Vegeta laughed breathily and groaned out, “I said: ‘You’re the beat of my heart, the breath in my lungs, the blood in my veins. My mate, my only, my soul.’ It’s a Saiyan mating vow.”

Piccolo rode Vegeta slower and said, “Well, what do I say back?” He tried to catch his breath.

“Seriously?” Vegeta said, a huge grin spreading on his face.

“Yeah, of course. I’m gonna have to learn Saiyan so you can’t just be muttering unknown shit all the time. Might as well start with this,” Piccolo said and threw his head back in pleasure. Vegeta’s dick really was magnificent. It fit Piccolo’s sheath like it was made for it.

“I never imagined giving language lessons with my mate riding my prick so perfectly,” Vegeta gasped, his hands running up and down Piccolo’s thighs.

“What, you thought your mate would do a shitty job riding your prick while you taught him to speak Saiyan? You asshole, thinking I’d be a shitty fuck,” Piccolo said, grinning as Vegeta’s scowl returned.

“I didn’t know I’d mate with such a fucking smart-ass, but I don’t regret anything. You are the absolute opposite of a shitty fuck, my heart. In fact I’m not sure I can teach you the vow before I fill your beautiful, magenta, velvet sheath with my seed.”

“Magenta, huh?”

Vegeta held Piccolo’s hips tightly so he could thrust more deeply. He gasped, “Indeed. Have you not seen it?”

“Nope. I suppose I’m flexible enough, but it never occurred to me to look inside my own _theadur._ Teach me some Saiyan, my love,” Piccolo breathed, “because I wanna say it before you shoot off inside me and knock me up.”

One of Vegeta’s fangs peeked out as he smirked and said, “So vulgar. Mmm…I love it. Repeat after me, my mate: _Oon peek tol vku-ginai._ ”

Piccolo did his best to repeat Vegeta’s words. Piccolo learned that Vegeta could giggle. Piccolo slapped Vegeta's pec in admonishment. 

Vegeta giggled more and said, “Your accent is adorable. Next: _lomak ren vku-tokle._ ” Piccolo butchered another Saiyan phrase. Vegeta continued, barely able to stop laughing long enough to spit it out, “ _Petrik tol vku-quvla._ ”

Piccolo slaughtered that one and Vegeta even quit thrusting up into Piccolo while he cackled. He eventually said, “Oh, gods, I love your accent. I love you. Okay, one more, my mate: _Vku-tseeka, vku-sot, vku-aiya._ ”

Piccolo entertained Vegeta again and said, “Okay, my very sympathetic asshole of a mate, what the fuck did I just say?”

Vegeta sat up and kissed Piccolo until they were panting and fucking with gusto again. Vegeta broke the kiss and whispered, “You said, ‘You are the sun on my skin, the wind in my hair, and the rain on my tongue. My mate, my only, my soul.’ Do you mean it?”

“Every butchered word, baby, except maybe the hair part, how bout the wind on my scalp?” Piccolo said and grinned as he kissed Vegeta, who pulled him down in his arms, so they writhed together with Piccolo on top.

“Smart-ass. No respect for the traditions of your mate’s people,” Vegeta murmured and smirked.

Hot, velvet-wrapped steel wound around Piccolo’s thigh, tightening and releasing in time with their thrusts. Piccolo broke their heated kiss to see if what he thought was happening was in fact happening. Vegeta’s tail looped around Piccolo’s thigh several times until the tip could brush back and forth over Piccolo’s ass cheek. The touch of Vegeta’s tail almost pushed Piccolo over the edge into coming, but he turned back to Vegeta, his eyebrows knit together, also unsure if it meant what Piccolo thought it meant.

On some level, Piccolo still couldn’t believe the powerful, sexy, arrogant alien wanted Piccolo. Really wanted him. Nothing Vegeta had said or done warranted such doubt, but Piccolo never thought of himself as someone that anyone could love at all, but especially like this. That nagging belief made Piccolo’s heart feel hollow his whole life, because on the rare occasions he allowed himself to dream of having someone who loved him, Piccolo found that the well of love in his own heart was fathomless. He ached for someone to love with wild abandon. To love like the love he heard in songs. The love that made great art. The love that people fought to keep, died to save. Piccolo’s whole being could turn to love, but he knew it would hide like a shy animal until someone loved him and coaxed it out.

Now, looking into Vegeta’s scared eyes, he recognized that fear in Vegeta too. Piccolo whispered in his mind, _I will love you with all that I am, as long as I live_.

It startled the shit out of Piccolo when he heard, _Likewise,_ minaiya _, I’ll love you with every breath. Take care of you until I breathe my last. I want to share everything with you,_ in Piccolo’s mind. But it was Vegeta’s voice.

_Holy shit_ , Piccolo thought back and Vegeta’s teary eyes went wide. _Are…are we telepathic together?_

_I believe so, my beautiful mate._

Tears spilled down Piccolo’s cheeks as he breathed, “Come inside me, my love, fill me up. I want your babies,” and felt none of the shame or fear that often accompanied admissions of his own needs or feelings to other people, even for simple things, like hunger or thirst. 

Vegeta stared into Piccolo’s eyes and they came together. Piccolo’s sheath gripped and squeezed and sucked Vegeta’s cock and every hot jet of Vegeta’s seed inside him sent a thrumming jolt of pleasure into Piccolo’s loins. A big dopey grin spread on Piccolo’s face as he gasped Vegeta’s name, because he felt Vegeta’s orgasm deep inside his own body, layered over his own pleasure. The connection they shared was that visceral.

Vegeta groaned, “Holy fucking shit, _minaiya_ , I…I feel you. I feel the pleasure I brought you.” Vegeta clutched at Piccolo, kissed him more and held their bodies together as their hips rocked and gradually stilled.

They kissed and Piccolo felt like his whole body buzzed from their mutual pleasure, their mutual love. Vegeta laid back down and pulled Piccolo down on his chest. The roar of the waterfall sounded distant as Piccolo listened to the steady beating of Vegeta’s heart. Piccolo whispered, “What’s the m-word mean?”

Vegeta’s hands ran lightly up and down Piccolo’s back. His tail still cuddled Piccolo’s thigh. “ _Minaiya_?” Vegeta asked and Piccolo nodded. “Hmm…I don’t know that there’s a good translation. I suppose literally it means ‘the soul of my tail,' which sounds silly in your tongue, but tail-twining is sacred. Touching another adult’s tail is intimate like your sheath. It’s reserved for one person. Tail-twining isn’t done lightly. You’re mine now. Completely. As I’m yours. It’s the highest expression of love, to call someone your _minaiya_ is to tell the world that that person _is_ your world. Your mate. Your chosen one.”

“I’m surprised you didn’t bite me. Is it weird that I kind of hoped you would bite me?” Piccolo asked, surprised again at how little he worried about being completely honest with his little mate, though they barely knew one another.

“If we claim each other, we will,” Vegeta said and when Piccolo looked at him questioningly he continued, “A Saiyan claim is more biological. There's no choice involved. Only destiny. There’s no forcing it. Also no escaping it. It’s rare amongst mates that don't grow up together, but it happens occasionally. We’ll have to see. Claiming usually takes a few days after first intimacy to set in, as I understand, but I left Vegeta-sei very young, so some of my knowledge is…lacking.”

“You have more about your people than I have about mine,” Piccolo said, intrigued to know there might be others out there like him.

“Too true, _minaiya,_ but we’ll make a new life somewhere, free from the constraints of our societies. Nameks are very conservative and restrictive. I don’t think you’d care for their way of life. Very…hierarchical and filial. Duty to elders and all the associated nonsense.”

Piccolo snuggled into Vegeta’s arms more as Vegeta kissed his temple. It was strange that it was so much more comfortable for Piccolo to rest on Vegeta than vice versa because of Vegeta’s absurd weight. Piccolo said, “I feel like I should just be fucking your brains out in what little time we have, but I wish we had more time so we could indulge in this too.”

“Gods, I know. I should have told them three days and to just have a party once that fool Kakarot arrives. Though I confess I’m looking forward to having a good fight for once.”

“Don’t be reckless,” Piccolo said, suddenly terrified that Goku would continue fucking shit up for Piccolo by killing his little mate.

“You do know me well already, don’t you, my heart?” Vegeta said with a little chuckle. “Fighting for you will keep me grounded. I’ve never had anything worth living for.”


	4. The Body Wants

Piccolo pushed up and off Vegeta and kissed him deeply. The kiss was not subtle. The kiss pleaded for more and Vegeta's hand wrapped around Piccolo’s cock as he paused to murmur, “I’ve never been fucked, _minaiya_ , but I can’t stop thinking about you being inside me.”

“That’s good, because I also can’t stop thinking about being inside your taut, perfect ass,” Piccolo said and kissed along the top edge of Vegeta’s pecs.

Vegeta frowned and said, “Fuck, I guess spit will have to do the trick. One of the disadvantages of fucking in the field.”

Piccolo grinned as he kissed Vegeta. He shifted to be between Vegeta’s legs and murmured, “Lucky you mated with someone magic,” and reached between Vegeta’s legs as he made lube pour out of his palm. Piccolo caressed Vegeta’s pucker and Vegeta moaned and opened his legs wider. “Hungry for me, my love?”

“Fucking starving,” Vegeta said and his eyes widened, “Holy shit, you can just…make…lube? That is an excellent skill. You’re even more amazing than I thought.” Vegeta crushed their mouths together.

“Relax, my love,” Piccolo whispered. Piccolo could feel Vegeta’s nervousness and simultaneous eagerness like a heartbeat in his mind. “I’ll take care of you, baby.”

“I know, your cock is just rather large,” Vegeta said with an adorable smirk.

Piccolo chuckled and went with a hunch as he trailed his claws through the soft fur of Vegeta’s tail while pulsing his fingertips on Vegeta’s bud. Vegeta’s guttural noise of pleasure encouraged Piccolo and he pressed his middle finger more firmly on Vegeta’s opening. “I love you so much, baby,” Piccolo said as he kissed along Vegeta’s delicious jawline. “I’m going to fuck you so well.” He sucked Vegeta’s earlobe and whispered, “I told you I’d have you begging on your belly, and I was telling the truth, Vegeta.” Piccolo nuzzled Vegeta’s ear, but he could feel Vegeta’s smile as his cheek muscles shifted.

Vegeta’s ass finally relaxed and Piccolo slipped his slick middle finger inside his little mate’s tight heat. Piccolo groaned, “Fucking hell, Vegeta…I might be begging too.”

Piccolo tried a little of his own chi play, sending the tiniest burst into Vegeta’s core as he pushed his finger deeper into Vegeta and found his prostate. Vegeta’s breathy cry made Piccolo’s cock twitch. He wanted to be inside his mate so badly.

Piccolo moved his hand carefully, stroking Vegeta’s prostrate until Vegeta’s hands were strangling Piccolo’s wrist he held him so tight against Vegeta. “More, fuck, more, _minaiya_ ,” Vegeta rasped.

Piccolo held his index finger tight alongside his middle finger as he plunged back into his mate, pushing hard and fast on Vegeta’s p-spot. Vegeta bucked toward him and approached the level of force that would break Piccolo’s wrist, but Piccolo loved it. He loved how out of control he was making Vegeta.

Piccolo scooted his other hand underneath Vegeta’s ass and gripped his tail like a cock. He moved that hand in tandem with his other, fingering Vegeta harder still and scissoring his fingers a little to stretch him. He kissed Vegeta between Vegeta’s breathy, panting cries until Vegeta said, “Now, I need it, I need your prick, my heart. Fuck me, please, oh gods, I want to come on your cock.”

Piccolo grinned and withdrew his fingers. He lifted Vegeta and put him on all fours. He ran lube over his cock until it was dripping and lined it up. Vegeta’s ass visibly relaxed. Piccolo eased his tip inside his mate and purred, “You okay, baby?”

“Fuck, yes, fuck, fuck, fuck,” Vegeta groaned and pushed back on Piccolo, taking his cock more suddenly than Piccolo expected. “Oh, gods, _minaiya_ , your cock…your cock is perfect!” Vegeta growled and slammed himself back until he engulfed Piccolo.

“Good gods, Vegeta!” Piccolo yelped, not expecting so much sudden sensation. He slapped Vegeta’s beautiful ass and curled over to kiss all over his scarred, muscular back.

Vegeta moaned and bashed his ass against Piccolo. “Piccolo, I need it. Fuck me rough. I need you to fuck me so hard!” Vegeta breathed.

Piccolo had never been so turned on in his entire life as he was in that moment. “I’m going to fuck you right into the ground, baby,” he murmured and wrapped his hand around the base of Vegeta’s tail, using it as a handle. His other hand found Vegeta’s cock and pumped it hard as he ramped up the pace of his thrusting. Vegeta cried out with every thrust until it was like one unending ululation of pleasure. Piccolo pistoned into his mate harder, knowing he wouldn’t last long. He began jerking Vegeta’s tail like a cock too.

Vegeta screamed, “Fuck! _Minaiya! Metul ne qi assot, vku-karam.”_

“What the fuck does that mean?” Piccolo gasped.

“Come with me now, my love, for fuck’s sake! I need your cum inside me! Now! Now! Now!” Vegeta commanded.

“I want your ass to grip me, baby!” Piccolo groaned and Vegeta’s seed shot out between his fingers. Piccolo pounded his mate as the powerful muscles of Vegeta’s opening gripped and clenched on him. Piccolo tucked his hips to find extra length, and his climax shook him as he spent himself in the heat of Vegeta’s core. He slapped Vegeta’s ass with a cum-coated hand.

Piccolo could no longer resist his desire to at least nibble on Vegeta, so he bit his way up the heavy ropes of muscle that framed Vegeta’s spine. “Oh fuck, Piccolo, fuck!” Vegeta cried and shivered violently, almost like he was coming again. His ass muscles’ wild spasms redoubled and Piccolo grinned, sucking on one of the bloodier bite wounds as Vegeta tucked his own hips. Piccolo put his hand back on Vegeta’s cock and felt the renewed jets of cum.

Piccolo wrapped a big arm around Vegeta’s chest. He sat back on his haunches, pulling Vegeta with him until he was bobbing up and down languidly on Piccolo’s lap, turning over his shoulder to kiss Piccolo’s bloodied mouth. Vegeta’s tail wrapped up around Piccolo’s upper arm and gave him a loving squeeze. “I love fucking you, Vegeta.”

“Good. Because that was fucking incredible,” Vegeta gasped out and slumped back into Piccolo as he finally stopped moving up and down.

Vegeta’s arms came up over his head and wrapped around Piccolo as he turned to kiss more over his shoulder. Piccolo whispered, as they paused for breath, “Your ass, Vegeta, is just…I don’t even know. It’s a fucking work of art. I want to bite it so badly.”

“I want that too,” Vegeta said and hummed happily. Piccolo squeezed his mate’s muscular torso.

“Do we have to go back? Can’t we just abscond with Nappa’s pod?”

“It is tempting,” Vegeta said, but Piccolo could hear in his voice that he wasn’t willing to let Goku exist in the world.

“I don’t want to lose you,” Piccolo said, his voice barely audible, “I just found you.”

“Mmm…I know, _minaiya_ , but…there are complicating factors. I deserted from Frieza’s army. He’s the most powerful being in the universe and he will never let me rest. He’ll hunt me until the day I die. I need the dragon balls.”

“They won’t be ready for another year.”

“Good. I’ll get rid of Kakarot and his idiot friends, then spend a year loving you, make my wish, and extricate myself from Frieza. Then we can live our lives however we please.”

“I like the sound of living our lives. Goku does piss me off, so I don’t care if you kill him, but don’t kill Gohan.”

“What? The little half-breed whiner?” Vegeta said and his eyebrow arched.

Piccolo chuckled. “He is a whiner, but I love him like a son. Don’t, okay?”

“Of course. From Raditz’s transmissions, it sounds as though he’s very powerful.”

“Yeah, he is. But he hasn’t learned to control it,” Piccolo said, hoping his training had done some good in that regard.

Vegeta nodded and said, “You stay here, then. I’ll watch over him and—“

“Fuck you, I’m not letting you go off to get fucked up by Goku!” Piccolo said.

“ _Minaiya_ …I…I can’t risk you. Please?”

“There’s no risk to me. Goku’s not going to hurt me and you’re not going to hurt me, right?”

“Of course not!” Vegeta said, casting a wounded look over his shoulder.

Piccolo crushed Vegeta’s body in a tight hug and kissed his neck. “I want to be there to make sure you’re okay.”

“Fine. I suppose you’re right. There’s no real threats to you now that you’ve stolen my heart. How do you feel, _minaiya_?” Vegeta said in a small, scared voice.

“What do you mean?” Piccolo asked.

“Do you feel like it took?” Vegeta said and met Piccolo’s eyes as he craned around.

Piccolo brow creased as he considered Vegeta’s question. The very idea struck Piccolo as absurd, given his (albeit very limited) experience with human pregnancy. He wouldn’t even be pregnant yet. But Piccolo took stock of his body. Because Piccolo wasn’t human. Vegeta wasn’t human. He closed his eyes and tuned in to the new sensations in his body that Vegeta had awoken.

After a few minutes he met Vegeta’s eyes and said, “I…Fuck…yeah. I think so. I don’t know for sure, but it feels like it. Can I really be pregnant that fast?”

Vegeta smirked and kissed Piccolo’s jaw as he growled, “Saiyan sperm are aggressive too. You can. My understanding of Namek pregnancies is that they are very fast, but the egg takes a while to incubate, but it’s been a long time since I fucked that Namek.”

“You said you’d never fucked another person’s _theadur!_ ” Piccolo said, his heart aching to think that Vegeta had mated with another.

“Of course not, my heart. I fucked his ass. He simply told me about it. I had no interest in mating with him. It was more a warning. I asked what it was, he explained Namek reproduction to me. That’s all. You’re my only. I’ve never wanted a mate until you,” Vegeta touched Piccolo’s jaw lightly to push him into a kiss. “But you feel it? You suspect, at least?”

“Yeah, I think so. Having never been pregnant before, I can’t say for sure. Just so you know, I’m not gonna let that bald asshole roll over me.”

“No, of course not. If the insolent asshole comes at you, you’ll have to fight back. I think you can take him.”

Piccolo expected Vegeta to be frenetic about their lovemaking. They had about an hour before they’d have to go back. But Vegeta was tender and loving, pulling Piccolo into the river with him where they made out and talked and cleaned each other off. When time grew short, Vegeta pushed Piccolo up onto a rock and spread his legs.

Vegeta hungered for Piccolo’s sheath, it seemed, as he kissed it softly before fingering Piccolo while he licked around his fingers. Vegeta only paused to plead for Piccolo to come for him. “Come for me, _minaiya_ , I want to feel you.”

“No…I want you to fuck me, baby,” Piccolo groaned, resisting Vegeta’s excellent head skills.

Vegeta put Piccolo on all fours on the sandy bank of the river and slid his cock inside Piccolo with punishing slowness. “Like this, my heart?”

“You call that fucking?” Piccolo said, reaching back with one long arm to grip Vegeta’s taut ass, to make him thrust harder, deeper.

“Mmm…is that what you want? You want me to rail you, my delicate flower?” Vegeta said with a chuckle.

Piccolo laughed too and growled, “You couldn’t rail me if you tried, you’re so little, baby.”

Vegeta’s ego was reliable and he slammed hard into Piccolo. His strong, rough hands dug into Piccolo’s hips and he gave Piccolo a proper Saiyan fucking, pistoning into him and roaring like an animal as he bent to bite and lick over Piccolo’s back. He rumbled out what Piccolo assumed were Saiyan endearments and pet names, but Piccolo didn’t care. Vegeta’s cock was made for Piccolo’s _theadur_ , filling him so perfectly that every delicious nerve woke to the friction his prick applied.

Piccolo held out, though. He wanted their final lovemaking to last as long as possible. Who knew how long it would be until they were together again? There was no telling how strong Goku had gotten and Piccolo was less confident than Vegeta. Goku lived for difficult, powerful opponents, and had faced them with glee, whereas Vegeta perhaps hadn’t had anyone really challenge him in a long time he was so powerful.

Piccolo pushed that fear out of his mind and focused on Vegeta’s rough, deep thrusts; the scrape of his callouses along Piccolo’s flanks, and the steady purr of his voice. Vegeta gasped, “ _Metul ne qi assot, vku-karam.”_

Piccolo was a quick learner: _Come for me now, my love._ Piccolo didn’t need to be told twice. He groaned, “With me, Vegeta. Fill me, baby,” and bucked back against Vegeta as hard as he could. Vegeta slapped his ass with a happy growl and Piccolo felt his mate’s seed erupt inside him. Piccolo’s _theadur_ went even crazier after such a long build up, making every muscle in his body tremble as it seized. Even his cock went off, splattering the dark sand with pearly cum.

Vegeta snarled more Saiyan and bit Piccolo’s back more, which was shockingly satisfying. Piccolo had a vivid fantasy of Vegeta really biting him. Sinking his teeth deep in the meat of Piccolo’s glute and holding on, marking him and claiming him. Piccolo panted at the thought of being scarred that way and imagined that Vegeta touching that spot would feel electric for the rest of Piccolo’s life.

Vegeta finished coming and eased out of Piccolo. He carried them back in the water to clean them off a final time. floating in the water, wrapped around Piccolo, Vegeta’s eyes filled with tears and he murmured, “I want to stay here forever.”

“I know, baby, me too,” Piccolo said against his lips, “It’s time though. I hear your scouter. Let’s go get it over with.”

“I love you, _minaiya_. My heart. My mate. My only. I can’t wait to start our life together.”

“I love you too, Vegeta. Let’s go fuck up some idiots.”

Vegeta growled happily and groped Piccolo under the water. “Gods, no wonder I couldn’t resist you.”

“Not that you tried,” Piccolo teased.

“And why would I try? You’re perfection.”

They kissed a final time, dressed, smacked each other around a bit for effect, and returned to the battle.


	5. Over Before It Started

Piccolo tried to reach Vegeta telepathically as Vegeta told Nappa to end the Earthlings before Goku returned. Goku appeared to be much stronger than they anticipated. Vegeta screamed for Nappa to leave Piccolo alive. But Piccolo needed them to leave _Gohan_ alive. Piccolo didn’t care about Krillin, but he loved Gohan as his own son. Gohan was the one who showed Piccolo that he could love. The one who made Piccolo realize he wanted to be a father. The one who cracked the carapace surrounding Piccolo’s heart. And Gohan was just a child. He had so much life ahead of him.

Nappa fucked Piccolo up in no time and Piccolo felt Vegeta’s wrath as he berated his partner for wounding Piccolo. Piccolo laid unconscious for a fair amount of time before he realized that Nappa was going to kill Gohan. Piccolo’s eyes filled with tears. The new life inside him stirred and Piccolo wanted it. He wanted his little mate, but not like this.

In a flash, he moved to save Gohan from Nappa’s blast. He heard Vegeta roar with rage as it happened, but then he was dying. Dead. Piccolo was grateful that he’d known some small happiness. He hoped that Vegeta would be okay. That he would love again and find a new mate and escape Frieza. But Piccolo slipped away, telling Gohan goodbye, and to be strong.

He reached out telepathically to Vegeta, pouring the last of his life-force into the effort, and said, _I love you, baby. I’m sorry. But I love you._

* * *

Piccolo trained and trained and trained with the idiots on King Kai’s planet only so he could free his mate. He needed to get back to Vegeta. Would Vegeta still love him after what he’d done on Earth? Piccolo couldn’t bear to think about it. He wondered if Vegeta would wish him back, or wish for immortality to defeat Frieza. Piccolo didn’t really want to know the answer. The thought of never being with Vegeta again made Piccolo’s guts twist so painfully that it brought tears to Piccolo’s eyes.

Piccolo never had to know the awful answer to that question because Gohan brought him back. Piccolo merged with Nail reluctantly, afraid again that it would change him enough that Vegeta wouldn’t love him anymore. But Frieza was too big a threat, Piccolo would need every bit of strength to free his little mate. Vegeta was terrified. Piccolo could feel it in his teeth, humming ominously. Vegeta knew he couldn’t win against Frieza, and he didn’t know what to do against a foe that was unbeatable.

Vegeta’s behavior had been erratic and wild since Piccolo’s death. Vegeta vacillated between absurd overconfidence and abject despair and self-loathing that led to cowardice. Piccolo thought Vegeta might benefit from some mindfulness training. Not that he’d be able to hear such a thing until he’d calmed down.

When Piccolo finally arrived where Gohan, Krillin, and Vegeta were attempting to stand-off against Frieza, it took every bit of his willpower not to cover Vegeta in kisses, steal a spaceship, and flee with his mate. But that would do no good. Frieza would find them. Hunt them down. End them.

Piccolo fought desperately, but it was useless. After Frieza wrecked him, he felt Vegeta being destroyed, rejuvenated, and finally, even as Piccolo clung to life, he heard Vegeta in his mind _,_ _I love you,_ minaiya _. Live well. Find another. I’m sorry I couldn’t defeat him._ But Piccolo had no time to respond. Frieza blasted his little mate’s heart, and he was gone.

* * *

Piccolo found himself alive and healed on Earth so suddenly that he had no clue what had happened. Why wasn’t he on Namek? He wanted to get back to Vegeta, to at least honor Vegeta’s body and put his little mate to rest. But before Piccolo could even shed a tear, he saw, with joy and terror and aching relief, that Vegeta was alive too, somehow, and here on Earth, mere meters away from Piccolo.

Their eyes met. All the others prattled about nonsense and the Nameks were distracting and interfering with all Piccolo wanted, which was to get Vegeta alone and find out if Vegeta still wanted him. Vegeta’s eyes burned on Piccolo’s skin. When Bulma asked Vegeta to come live at her compound, Piccolo said nothing. Vegeta acquiesced, eyeballing Piccolo while Piccolo eyeballed Bulma.

At last everyone left and Vegeta walked, visibly shaking, toward Piccolo. Piccolo’s eyes filled and he said, “I’m sorry, Vegeta. I…he’s like a son to me.”

Vegeta searched Piccolo’s eyes and his dark eyebrows scrunched together. “What?”

“Do you hate me? For what I did?”

“For what? Trying to defeat Frieza? For taking the other Namek into your body?” Vegeta said, canting his head to the side. He slid his hands around Piccolo’s waist.

“No, for…for sacrificing myself for Gohan,” Piccolo said, his head lowering. He couldn’t stop himself as he kissed Vegeta. He moaned into the kiss. Vegeta thrust his tongue into Piccolo’s mouth. Vegeta wrapped himself around Piccolo entirely. Piccolo felt Vegeta’s tears mingle with his own as their cheeks brushed together in their frantic kissing.

Vegeta pulled out of the kiss, gasping, “Of course I’m not mad, _minaiya_! I can’t feel anything except insane joy that you’re alive. That I’m alive with you. That…that we can be together, really together, even if we are trapped on this miserable planet.”

Piccolo grinned and kissed Vegeta more and said, “It’s not _that_ bad.”

Vegeta smirked. He held Piccolo’s face while Piccolo held him up by his ass and he whispered, “Did…did you lose it? When you were killed and resurrected?”

Piccolo knew what Vegeta meant, but he wished he didn’t. The first thing he’d noticed upon reaching the Otherworld was the heartbreaking emptiness he felt. Though he’d only been pregnant for a few hours when he was killed, he had felt the tiniest flare of chi in his belly. The first sign of their baby together. Piccolo ached to have that back, but it was gone. It didn’t return when he was resurrected and Piccolo was a little resentful that he hadn’t thought more carefully about how Gohan should have worded the wish to bring Piccolo back.

Piccolo nodded and more tears slipped down his cheeks. He said, “Yeah, it’s…it’s gone. I’m sorry, _vku-tseeka_.” Piccolo thought maybe if kept using the little bits of Saiyan he picked up, that at some point he wouldn’t sound like a complete idiot.

Vegeta’s surprised, dopey grin told Piccolo that it had at least cheered his mate some. Vegeta said, “I assumed that it was lost when Nappa killed you, but…ah well. I wish that fucking whelp had let me wish you back. I would have done it properly.”

“You…you would have wished me back?” Piccolo said, scared to hear the answer.

“Of course! That was why I went to Namek. I would have wished you back as an immortal with our baby still in your belly. And then used the other wish to make myself immortal. But it doesn’t matter. I’m just glad you’re alive. That you’re safe. That I can protect you here. That Frieza’s gone. Kakarot too. Nothing can hurt you now,” Vegeta said and caressed Piccolo’s face, wiping his tears away before pressing their mouths together again.

“What do we do now, my love? How do I say that in Saiyan?” Piccolo said, but couldn’t stop kissing Vegeta long enough for his little mate to answer.

Vegeta wrapped his arms around behind Piccolo and murmured against his lips, “ _Vku-karam_ , my love. Fuck, Piccolo, I can’t think of anything but being inside you. I missed you and I…thought…I thought I’d lost you forever. I can’t bear it. I can’t bear to be away from you ever again. Not for a day. Never. I know I sound needy and insane, but I don’t care. Don’t leave me again.”

“Never, _vku-karam_ ,” Piccolo said and squeezed Vegeta tighter.

Vegeta floated them up into the air and said, “Waterfall?”

“Gods, yeah, perfect,” Piccolo panted as Vegeta’s hands began to explore the places where his gi was torn and missing.

Piccolo didn’t understand the level of feeling that wracked him. When Vegeta had taken him as a mate months earlier, Piccolo thought the intensity of the choice was what turned him to absolute mush with Vegeta. But not a day had passed training with King Kai, or a minute on Namek when Piccolo hadn’t felt a physical longing for Vegeta. It was like a tightness through his whole chest and belly, like he couldn’t take a real breath when he wasn’t touching Vegeta.

The closest Piccolo had felt to being able to breathe had been when he was fighting Frieza and protecting his mate from that monster. He failed, of course, but Piccolo felt like his whole brain had turned to white fire to protect Vegeta, his eyes glazing with a red tint. Only once Frieza had thoroughly trounced him did Piccolo realize that it was some kind of biological response to the imminent danger to his mate.

Vegeta sucked all over his skin. They flew together, each holding the other up, and Piccolo directed their bodies toward the waterfall where he preferred to make camp. Vegeta lowered them into the grass and tore at Piccolo’s clothes. Vegeta gasped, “It broke me to be so helpless on Namek. You were so powerful, but I just…I just watched him hurt you. I was a coward.”

“Vegeta, shut up and fuck me,” Piccolo murmured against his little mate’s lips.

Vegeta chuckled and said, “ _That_ I can do.”

Piccolo made their clothes disappear and Vegeta squawked in surprise. Then he laughed harder and kissed all over Piccolo’s belly. Before he could even lick Piccolo’s cock, Piccolo curled up and took Vegeta’s lean hips in his hands and shifted him to suck his prick.

“No…gods, Piccolo…No, I want to fuck you and I can’t resist your fucking crazy tongue!”

“Just suck my dick, Vegeta, and stop pretending you don’t want this. I can hear your brain. You never get soft, you can fuck me after I’ve tasted you.”

“Fucking gods, _minaiya_ , when you talk like that…”

Piccolo ignored Vegeta’s muttering and sucked Vegeta’s balls, unhinging his jaw to take both at once, which produced a satisfyingly indescribable noise from Vegeta’s throat. Vegeta deep-throated Piccolo, but didn’t stop moaning. Piccolo didn’t mind, Vegeta moaning on his prick was one of the many things Piccolo had missed in their time apart.

He missed the taste of Vegeta’s pre-cum, the musky, fertile smell of his balls and taint and cock, and of course, the cock itself. Piccolo’s tongue got to work, teasing up and down the underside Vegeta’s prick, making Vegeta gasp and squirm, before Piccolo wrapped it tightly around Vegeta’s head, twisting back and forth. That resulted in plenty of Vegeta’s pre-cum, and as he squeezed his tongue down the length of Vegeta’s shaft and followed his tongue with his lips and mouth, Vegeta stopped pretending he could suck cock at the same time as Piccolo blew him and resorted to screaming and jerking Piccolo off roughly while fingering his sheath. It felt amazing. Piccolo loved turning Vegeta into a mess.

Vegeta came quickly, his whole body shivering, and he sucked Piccolo’s cock deep into his throat as he finished. That was enough to set off Piccolo’s sheath and his prick spiraled into a powerful joint orgasm. It made Vegeta squeak with a second round of pleasure—Piccolo felt Vegeta’s too, but Piccolo’s double orgasm took Vegeta’s brain by surprise. It was clear he’d forgotten the level of connection they shared in that way.

He quivered and moved off Piccolo’s face and kissed his still recovering mouth, getting his chin partially in Piccolo’s mouth before he could fix his jaw’s dislocation. Vegeta seemed to like it though, taking the unfurled length of Piccolo’s tongue in his mouth and sucking it like a cock. He didn’t stop mouth-fucking Piccolo as he thrust into Piccolo’s sheath with his spit-slick cock.

 _Fuuuuck_ , Piccolo groaned in his mind to his mate. Vegeta grinned and shifted his face enough that Piccolo could re-hinge his jaw. But he didn’t let Piccolo’s tongue retract. He slammed himself into Piccolo hard, like he was already coming, and Piccolo couldn’t even tell if Vegeta was coming because their mutual pleasure was so fantastic. Vegeta’s hand gripped Piccolo’s cock and stroked it mercilessly, his other barely holding Vegeta’s ridiculous weight off Piccolo.

“Come, _minaiya_ , come for me, again, I need it, please, oh fuck, how do you feel this good? I’m fucking you all day!” Vegeta groaned and Piccolo realized that Vegeta had not been coming. When he did, and his seed filled Piccolo, Piccolo’s mind blanked into nothing but that pleasure. A visceral need for more of it. Piccolo’s body attacked Vegeta’s cock. It surged against his lithe hips and Piccolo’s _theadur_ suckled at Vegeta’s prick, taking more and more cum.

Vegeta’s chi roared up until the debris on the ground near them began to fly away in little dust devils. “Fuck, Piccolo! Fucking gods! Yes, take my cock!”

“Fuck me harder! Come in me again, Vegeta! I need it!” Piccolo gasped and groaned when Vegeta flipped him onto all fours. Piccolo cried out with every brutal, amazing thrust and slammed himself back against his mate as Vegeta nipped and bit and scratched him, his other hand still jerking Piccolo off so relentlessly that Piccolo wasn’t sure he’d ever stopped coming.

The day blurred into night as they mauled each other, slamming their bodies together in every configuration possible. Piccolo’s balls ached and still he splattered his little mate, inside and out, with cum. Vegeta filled his sheath and his ass until it dripped out of him in the brief moments they weren’t fucking. But Piccolo still didn’t feel the sweet, twisting ecstasy he’d felt when they’d conceived.

There was also a background ache to every coupling that at first Piccolo couldn’t identify. Their euphoria was intense and non-stop, so Piccolo couldn’t rightly say that it didn’t feel as good as the first time, because they learned more of each other’s bodies each time, so the pleasure was more intense, the ability to drive it higher or string it out easier with every time. But when they collapsed together as the sun rose on the second day, Piccolo had a realization. Vegeta’s tail. Vegeta’s tail was missing and Piccolo ached to have it touch him.

Piccolo considered saying something, but there was nothing to be done, so it seemed to him that it would only serve to upset his little mate. Piccolo couldn’t complain. Their sex was incredible. Maybe the ache would go away if the claiming that Vegeta spoke about happened. Piccolo’s teeth had throbbed the last few times they’d fucked. They lengthened too and saliva filled his mouth like he was starving.

Before Piccolo could mention it to Vegeta, who kissed down his spine, palming his ass as he drove into Piccolo’s sheath, Vegeta growled, “I want to claim you, _vku-tseeka_. I’ve tried to resist, but I need it. I want you to be mine forever.”

“Fuck, yes! Now, Vegeta, I need it! I feel like I’m on fire!” Piccolo said, arching his back toward Vegeta’s mouth.

Vegeta sucked on the top curve of Piccolo’s ass and murmured, “ _Vkai_ , _vku-tseeka. Vk karam oon asef. Asmrul._ ”

“What the fuck does—“ Piccolo stopped mid-sentence. The headiest orgasm of his entire life roared through him as Vegeta’s teeth sank into Piccolo’s ass. Vegeta rutted on Piccolo, filling him again, somehow, despite their nonstop love-making. Piccolo groaned and took it, sensing that it would piss Vegeta off if Piccolo moved.

Vegeta growled, more animal than man, “I said, ‘Mine, my mate. I love you always. Forever.’ Fuck, Piccolo, you feel amazing. You’re mine!”

They rode out the throes of the orgasm, Piccolo’s whole pelvis thrumming with the intensity of the clenching. Vegeta licked at the wound, trailed his fingertips over it, all while muttering, “ _Vkai_ ,” over and over again against Piccolo’s skin.

In the base of Piccolo’s brain he felt the moment Vegeta’s orgasm ceased and he pulled off Vegeta’s cock. He spun Vegeta around and drove hard into his cum-slick ass. Piccolo used his alien flexibility and hissed, “ _Vkai_ , Vegeta. You’re mine. _Vk karam oon, asef,_ ” and bit Vegeta’s ass in the mirrored spot to Piccolo’s own mark.

Piccolo moaned helplessly as he sank his fangs into Vegeta’s cake ass. Never had Piccolo wanted anything in his life like he wanted to claim Vegeta as his own. Vegeta whimpered and bucked back toward him. Piccolo growled low in his throat and Vegeta stilled. Piccolo had no idea what magic spell he was under, but it was as if he couldn’t stop his own actions. He would burn if he did. The very thought of letting go of Vegeta’s ass before he’d finished coming inside his little mate made Piccolo feel like he would be consumed by flames.

They gasped together as Piccolo’s climax relented, and Vegeta's too. Piccolo sucked hard on the bloody mark and trailed his long, flexible tongue over the bloody dual crescents. His claim on Vegeta. Piccolo smiled and kissed it. “You’re mine, Vegeta. Forever.”

Vegeta panted and collapsed, sliding off Piccolo. He breathed, “I am yours, _vku-karam_. I am. Forever. And you’re _vkai_.”

Piccolo flopped down beside Vegeta. Vegeta rolled and pulled Piccolo onto his chest. “Holy shit, Vegeta. I’m exhausted.”

“Three hours didn’t cut it before,” Vegeta said, still breathing hard. Piccolo trailed his fingers over Vegeta’s chest, feeling the new scar where Frieza had killed him.

“No shit. I’m not sure forty-eight is enough, but I need some sleep. I’m pretty hungry too, but this is perfect for now,” Piccolo said, “Baby…I…I don’t think it took this time.”

Vegeta’s silence hung in the air for a few minutes. He said, “No, not for me either.”

“Wait, what? You can get pregnant too?”

“Yes. Saiyan males can get pregnant, but it’s usually triggered fertility, so it maybe hasn’t been triggered again since my resurrection. It’s also suppressed by the pregnancy of a mate. So it could be lingering from that. It doesn’t matter. We have plenty of time now. It’s such a relief to have that slimy white lizard dead. My whole life has been ruled by him. It’s like I can finally breathe.”

Piccolo kissed Vegeta’s pec. He murmured, “You don’t regret taking me as your mate? Now that you actually have life ahead of you?”

Vegeta twisted his head off to the side so he could look into Piccolo’s eyes. “Of course not. I love you. I’ll always love you, _vku-sot_.”

“What’s that mean? You won’t get away with your Saiyan nonsense for long. I’m a quick study,” Piccolo said and pushed up enough that he could kiss Vegeta’s mouth.

“I’m not ‘getting away’ with anything. It means, ‘my only.’ You are my only. If you learn to speak Saiyan, I’m not sure what will happen to me because I’ll never be able to stop fucking you,” Vegeta said and smirked as he kissed Piccolo more. “Apparently the blue-haired woman has space for me at her compound. I assume you live off the land?”

“Mostly. Nameks can go long periods of time without food or water. We could get our own place or we can live at Bulma’s. I doubt Bulma will care if I’m skulking around too.”

“Can someone your size skulk?” Vegeta said, grinning, and kissed Piccolo onto his back.

“I guess we’ll find out. She’ll make good training tech, so it might be worthwhile to stay there. I can make us a house with magic, but it will take time. It exhausts me to make too much stuff at a time.”

“I see no reason not to take her up on her offer. You’ll want to be around here to train with the half-breed, I assume?”

Piccolo smiled and slipped his tongue into Vegeta’s mouth as Vegeta climbed above him. “You realize our children will be ‘half-breeds’ too, right?”

“I know, but they’ll be amazing. You’re so beautiful, my heart,” Vegeta said, his eyelids falling as he went back to kissing Piccolo. “I can’t believe we’re alive together. The universe has never treated me well, not that I’ve deserved it, but this, you, being with you, makes up for every misfortune in my life.”

“You’re so sappy for such a little psychopath,” Piccolo teased and curled up to pull Vegeta into his lap. “Let’s clean up and go eat at Bulma’s, if she’s really willing to house a couple of aliens.”

“I can’t fuck you one more time?” Vegeta said, tracing his fingers over Piccolo’s dripping sheath.

“Later. If we get going again, we’ll fuck another forty-eight hours and you’ll waste away. So let’s go, baby. We’ve got our whole lives ahead of us.”


	6. The Purple-Haired Boy

Piccolo watched his mate become more frantic and despairing by the day as they both remained stubbornly not pregnant. Vegeta tried every sexual position they could fathom, forbade Piccolo from taking baths, prohibited training for a whole month, and tried all manner of foods that he believed would bring fertility. Piccolo didn’t know what to do except acquiesce to all Vegeta’s attempts to solve the problem.

Piccolo wanted to be a father too. Wanted it badly. But he could feel it. Every single time they made love, there was never the soft, heated twist that he’d felt when he conceived that first time. The brief flood of a different type of euphoria. Piccolo never felt Vegeta have that either, so he knew. He always knew, even when Vegeta held out hope.

Piccolo’s pain was amplified by how stressed it made his little mate. Piccolo’s infertility felt like a failure when it caused Vegeta so much anguish. Piccolo would have given anything to make himself pregnant, but neither of them could think of anything else to do besides to keep trying.

As their first year drew to a close they were laying by their waterfall, making leisurely love under a flawless blue sky when Piccolo felt something out of his nightmares. Vegeta was on top of him, kissing over Piccolo’s chest, and his head snapped up suddenly. “What the fuck is that, _minaiya_? It…it can’t be. No! It can’t. Fuck. No!” Vegeta eased off Piccolo and said, “Hide. I’ll find you once I’ve defeated him. Suppress your chi.”

“No, Vegeta, I’m not letting you go face him alone. There’s someone—“

“It’s his father. He’s less powerful, but still formidable. Fuck! That coward Kakarot must not have finished him off!” Vegeta dressed quickly. Piccolo hopped up and dressed himself. A part of him thought if they were both going to die, they might as well stay and finish fucking, but Vegeta’s eyes were hazy and distant. Piccolo now recognized this look. 

Piccolo and Bulma, who had become surprisingly close over the past year, referred to this state of being as “mate-crazy.” It happened right away when they moved into Capsule Corp. Bulma offered Piccolo some food and touched his elbow and the next thing Piccolo knew, Vegeta had her cornered while he paced back and forth with his teeth bared, threatening her with death if she came near Piccolo again. It took an hour to calm Vegeta down. After that first time, they got better at spotting the early signs.

Piccolo had experienced mate-crazies a few times, but he wasn’t like Vegeta. The longer Piccolo’s infertility wore on, the more frequent Vegeta’s bouts were. Poor Bulma had even developed a Saiyan tranquilizer. During the testing, she had to contend with Piccolo’s mate-crazies every time she injected Vegeta with the new iteration. All in all, Piccolo admired Bulma’s willingness to put up with Piccolo and Vegeta’s bullshit. Vegeta was wary and regularly complained that she liked Piccolo as more than a friend. Piccolo thought if that sort of feeling was present in Bulma, it was toward Vegeta.

Vegeta launched toward the ominous impending feel of Frieza. Piccolo followed and Vegeta looked back, snarling, “Go back to the compound, _minaiya_. Tell the woman, you can take her into hiding with you—“

“The fuck I will! I’m staying with you. I won’t do it again. I’m not going to live through your death again, baby,” Piccolo snapped and sped up until he was even with Vegeta.

Vegeta visibly struggled to tame the mate-craziness that threatened his sanity. Piccolo knew mate-crazies could be useful, giving a burst of power, but they only gave brute strength, which wouldn’t be enough with Frieza. Piccolo could feel Vegeta’s inner struggle like a toothache. Vegeta trained constantly, but he still hadn’t achieved super Saiyan like Goku. It tore Piccolo’s little mate apart that he wasn’t as strong as Goku. Piccolo reminded him that together they were as strong as Goku, they just had to be smarter than Goku if faced with a powerful enemy. 

When they touched down, the others were there. No one besides Bulma knew about Vegeta and Piccolo, which was fine with both of them. They weren’t exactly social and being telepathic meant they were always in contact without necessarily appearing that way. Bulma and Piccolo both informed Vegeta that on Earth, gay couples were frequently discriminated against. Vegeta didn’t even understand the concept of “gay” and “straight.” It was one of many things Piccolo loved about him.

Now, with the others present, they stood a fair distance apart. Vegeta’s other reason for discretion was a deep-seated belief that some of his former foes might use Piccolo as a means for revenge against Vegeta. This particular line of reasoning pissed Piccolo off: none of the Earth weaklings could hurt Piccolo. Gohan, maybe, but he never would because he was loyal to Piccolo, looked up to him, and saw him as a mentor and teacher.

Piccolo glanced at Vegeta and tried not to laugh at Vegeta’s pink “Bad Man” shirt. Piccolo and Bulma found it online and Piccolo loved whenever Vegeta wore it, which he only did to make Piccolo happy.

Vegeta’s smirk threatened as he murmured, _I think you like watching me take it off best, my heart,_ in Piccolo’s mind.

_I like watching you take anything off, baby_ , Piccolo said back, proud that he kept a straight face, not even looking in Vegeta’s direction. _I’m pretty pissed that he interrupted our fucking, on top of just being alive in general_.

_Likewise. It might be some time until we get back to it._

_If we get back to it at all,_ Piccolo said, barely suppressing a snort.

_I love your pessimism, my heart,_ Vegeta said and his smirk briefly won. 

_You sure you don’t want to go behind those rocks and finish what we started, baby? Just in case we don’t make it._ Piccolo said and feigned having an itch on his nose, so he could cover his mouth and hide the smile that spread on his face against his will.

Vegeta didn’t answer, but Piccolo felt him struggle against both the desire to do as Piccolo suggested, and the urge to laugh about the suggestion. Before they could converse more, or finish fucking behind some rocks, Frieza’s ship landed and a purple-haired boy cut him down like he was livestock, not the most feared being in the universe. Piccolo, Vegeta, and all the others gaped.

The boy offered no explanation for how he could go super Saiyan, and Piccolo felt Vegeta’s stress and outrage heat up to a boil. Piccolo said, _Settle down, vku-karam, no matter how it pisses you off, he’d destroy you._

Vegeta glared at Piccolo and flared a nostril in the direction of the boy. Piccolo continued, _Do you want to live or satisfy your fucking ego? If you go after him, I’ll get mate-crazy, and he can definitely kill me, so settle down!_

Vegeta stared at Piccolo. Piccolo knew Vegeta was getting worn down from the telepathy. Talking mentally exhausted Vegeta, but his ego prevented him from admitting it and just speaking aloud. Instead he would lapse into surly silence until he’d built up the mental strength to reach out to Piccolo again. Piccolo sighed. He loved his little mate, but Vegeta was trying at times too.

Even though Vegeta remained silent after Piccolo’s telepathic directive, he obeyed and didn’t go after the boy. The lavender-haired Saiyan kept eyeballing Vegeta, looking sheepish, and looking away. It pissed Piccolo off, the way the boy wouldn’t stop staring. The boy was far too young for Vegeta, but perhaps there was some undeniable Saiyan attraction happening. Piccolo began to panic, began to strategize how to defeat the smaller, but much more powerful, warrior.

“What are you looking at, boy!?” Vegeta snarled. Vegeta glared as the boy blushed and stammered. 

Now Piccolo was certain the little shit was after Vegeta. Piccolo’s chi rocketed up. Vegeta’s weary voice came in his mind, _No, my heart. Don’t. He is nothing. You’re my only. Want to go fuck behind the rocks?_

Piccolo needed it. He would lose his shit if he didn’t have his mate right that moment. Vegeta said aloud, “I’m going for a walk, this waiting is obnoxious, even if the clown does show up.”

Piccolo waited a few minutes, then wandered off without comment. Gohan squeaked, “Where’re you going, Mr. Piccolo?”

“Getting the lay of the land, I’ll be back before Goku arrives,” Piccolo said with what he hoped was a menacing finality so Gohan didn’t want to continue to converse. Piccolo’s teeth thrummed with need for Vegeta. Now. The purple-haired little shit was a threat. Piccolo needed to end him.

_Come to me, my heart_ , Vegeta’s voice purred.

Piccolo launched off toward his mate. Vegeta’s chi was suppressed to near invisibility and Piccolo did the same. He could sense Vegeta even with suppressed chi, but hoped that foolish purple-haired pissant wouldn’t be able to sense Piccolo’s mate.

Piccolo touched down in front of Vegeta, who leaned casually back against a huge rock about half a mile away from where the others waited for Goku. They were hidden from view as Piccolo crushed Vegeta’s mouth with his own, rolling his hard-on against Vegeta, as he hiked his little mate up on his hips.“I need you,” Piccolo growled against Vegeta’s neck as he sucked down the side.

“Fuck me, _minaiya,_ I want you so badly,” Vegeta panted as Piccolo set Vegeta down to undress him. His fingers flew down the buttons, shoving the pink shirt off Vegeta’s glorious shoulders as Vegeta unzipped his pants and shoved them down. Vegeta gasped, "You can make yourself a new gi, yes?”

“Yes, hurry, now,” Piccolo breathed, twining his tongue with Vegeta’s as Vegeta tore his gi to shreds, tossing the weighted cape and cap off with a crash.

“Gods, Piccolo,” Vegeta purred and fell to his knees, taking Piccolo deep in his mouth in one fast plunge.

“Oh fuck, baby! Your mouth is amazing, but I need you. I need to fuck you, please! Please don’t suck me off right now, oh gods, Vegeta, holy shit!” Piccolo pleaded as Vegeta mouth-fucked him, gripping Piccolo’s ass and digging his fingers into the mouth-shaped scar on Piccolo’s ass. The touch of Vegeta’s skin against Piccolo’s claim made him tremble.

Vegeta’s head moved fast and his tongue licked around Piccolo’s tip every time he reached it. He pulled off to groan, “Gods, Piccolo, I want to taste you first. Please, come for your mate!”

Piccolo’s pelvis throbbed with pleasure as he spent himself in Vegeta’s mouth with Vegeta’s fingers digging into his claim. Vegeta moaned and mouth-fucked Piccolo harder. Piccolo rasped, “Now, fuck, Vegeta, now, I’m on fire!” He hoisted his little mate up, sucked his own fingers, and slid them inside Vegeta. Vegeta panted and let his upper body fall back against the cliff face. Piccolo made lube pour out of his hand, making Vegeta slick and wet inside.

“Fuck me rough, my heart,” Vegeta purred and rolled his hips so his knees were on his shoulders.

Piccolo palmed Vegeta’s perfect ass cheeks, spread him, and drove inside Vegeta hard and fast. Vegeta cried out. Piccolo pounded into his mate. He needed his mate. To feel his mate come. Because all Piccolo could see was that stupid boy who was trying to take Vegeta from him. The stupid boy thought that strength was all that mattered. That he could steal Vegeta by force.

Vegeta’s hands suddenly gripped Piccolo’s face and he kissed Piccolo, slipping his tongue into Piccolo’s mouth. After a heated, kiss, bouncing with Piccolo’s frantic thrusting, Vegeta pulled back and whispered, “You are mine, Piccolo. I’m yours. I’m yours. You’re safe. I’m safe.”

“No! We’re not! You’re just…distracting me…are you helping him?!” Piccolo hissed, tears filling his red-glazed eyes as he searched his mate’s.

Vegeta reached acrobatically and pinched Piccolo’s mating mark. It hurt a lot and also felt good. Piccolo’s mind came back to him a little and he realized he had fucked a cave right into the giant rock outcropping they were against. “Baby? Are you okay?” Piccolo said, the mate-crazy hangover hitting him like a bitch slap.

Vegeta rocked against him and said, “I will be if you finish fucking me, my heart. Don’t leave me unfinished again. Fuck me, but stop worrying about that half-breed whelp.”

Piccolo curled to kiss Vegeta, but pulled him off the rubble and laid on the ground. “Ride me, my love. I want to look at you,” Piccolo whispered.

Vegeta smirked and said, “I want it rough, so I’m going to ride you like the idiot humans do with angry male cattle.”

Piccolo decided he might have to invest in some chaps for Vegeta after that statement. Maybe a cowboy hat. Vegeta slammed down on him with a groan and then began to really fuck Piccolo. The ground shook under Vegeta’s vigorous movements and Piccolo bucked up into his mate like champion rodeo bull stock.

“Fuck! Piccolo, your cock is hitting it perfectly!” Vegeta said, almost whimpered.

Piccolo gasped, “Come all over me, baby. I want your cum on me.”

Vegeta dropped hard onto Piccolo and splattered him with giz. He cried out with the last few powerful drives downward, and then collapsed forward onto Piccolo’s cum-slick chest. Piccolo’s hands moved ceaselessly on his mate’s skin. The mate-crazies lingered on the periphery of his hangover, perhaps because he hadn’t come. Vegeta took a few deep breaths and said, “Did…did you not come?” He pushed himself up and looked down at Piccolo before beginning to rock his hips again. “My heart, are you holding back on purpose?”

Piccolo didn’t like how easily Vegeta saw through him. Piccolo snarled, “I don’t want you to go back and be near him. What if…what if you get it in your head to have a Saiyan mate?”

Vegeta narrowed his eyes and said, “There is only one thing to do about your particularly virulent case of mate-crazies. The woman would be sad she wasn’t here to study this bout.”

“She would like seeing you naked, that’s for sure,” Piccolo said with a snort. Vegeta pulled off his cock and Piccolo winced at how achingly hard he still was. Going back to the waiting now would be awful. “Oh fuck!” Piccolo cried out as Vegeta unceremoniously pushed into Piccolo’s sheath.

“There you go, my poor, neglected _minaiya_ , it was a mistake to pull out earlier. No wonder you’re such a disaster,” Vegeta said with a big smirk.

“I’m not a disaster!” Piccolo said. Bulma and Piccolo regularly referred to Vegeta as a disaster, and it was accurate. Applying that very Vegeta term to Piccolo was very upsetting, particularly when _Vegeta_ was the one saying it.

“My heart, you just need my cock, there’s no shame in it. I didn’t realize how…unsatisfied…you were with just my ass,” Vegeta said with another little smirk of challenge.

“Hey! That’s not—“ Vegeta cut Piccolo off with a deep kiss.

“ _Minaiya_ , shush, let me fuck you and see if you feel better. You can see now that you have a bit of the mate-crazies?”

Piccolo nodded reluctantly, but he was losing all interest in anything but Vegeta’s cock pulling most of the way out, then thrusting back deeply inside Piccolo’s sheath, the semen from a bout that morning already absorbed. Piccolo wished his fucking _womb_ would take the damn sperm and do something useful with it. Piccolo was seized by a sudden urge to cry about his barrenness. He wanted to give Vegeta a baby so badly. No wonder Vegeta was looking for a new mate.

“My heart, for fuck’s sake, stop these thoughts. I’m fucking you, not him, right this moment. I don’t want to fuck him at all, and I certainly don’t want to _mate_ with him—“

“You’d probably knock him up right away. You’d be happier with him, Vegeta,” Piccolo shoved at Vegeta, wanting him out of Piccolo.

“Piccolo, do I need to slap sense into you?” Vegeta growled.

Piccolo shook his head. He stared into Vegeta’s eyes, pulled his little mate closer, and kissed him. Piccolo breathed deeply of Vegeta’s scent and slid his hand down onto Vegeta’s mating mark. The relief it brought, the peace, and the comfort were instantaneous. “I’m sorry, baby,” Piccolo said, fully hungover from his mate-crazies in addition to his aching need to come.

Vegeta kissed along his jawline and muttered, “Not necessary. Take my cock, my heart, you need it.” Piccolo groaned as Vegeta reached between their bodies and took Piccolo’s cock in hand. “Come for me, _minaiya_.”

Piccolo shuddered and the pull of Vegeta’s command was too strong for him to resist. Piccolo’s balls tightened and a thrill of electric pleasure raced up his cock as his cum sprayed out around Vegeta’s fingers. Vegeta groaned and filled Piccolo, making him spread his legs wider, eager to have more of Vegeta’s seed. Piccolo breathed, “I want to have your baby, Vegeta.”

“I know, my heart. I want that too,” Vegeta said, his breathing ragged, but calming as their bodies stilled. 

Piccolo ran a hand over his face. “Fuck. Sorry, Vegeta. Gods. I’m a fucking mess.”

Vegeta peeled his hand away and looked into Piccolo’s eyes. “Shh…I love you. I have no interest in that child. He smells. I could never mate with him, even if you were lost to me. Stop worrying about him. Can you keep the crazies at bay? Or should you go back to the compound?” Vegeta’s face was all concern and caring.

Piccolo wrapped his big body around his little mate, burying his face in Vegeta’s neck and hair. Vegeta sat back on his haunches and lifted Piccolo along with him. Piccolo grumbled, “I’ll be okay. I think. Fuck. I hate them. I feel so shitty during and even worse afterwards.”

“We need to get you knocked up. That’s the problem,” Vegeta said into Piccolo’s neck where he kissed and nipped, making Piccolo shiver.

“I’m sorry I keep letting you down, baby,” Piccolo said. Vegeta bit him hard. “Ow! What was that for?”

“Stop saying that! We have no idea why it isn’t taking, so stop apologizing! For all we know it’s me that’s sterile: I haven’t gotten pregnant either,” Vegeta snarled and bit him again.

“Stop fucking biting me!” Piccolo snapped. He nipped Vegeta back, and having the sharper fangs, Vegeta yelped. “You’ll get us going again and I can feel Goku’s almost here. We should go back.”

Vegeta snorted and pulled out of Piccolo. Piccolo knew their coupling had been unproductive again, but he willed himself not to show his disappointment. But Vegeta was too attuned to Piccolo’s mind. “My heart…”

“I don’t want to talk about it. I’m a big enough wreck right now. Let’s go,” Piccolo said and remade his gi. Vegeta shrugged on his shirt and tugged on his pants, buttoning himself up. “I’ll head back first.”

Piccolo launched back and settled into a floating lotus pose, hoping Gohan’s half-Saiyan sense of smell wouldn’t pick up what was all over Piccolo. Gohan was thankfully oblivious. “Hey, Mr. Piccolo! I think my dad’s getting close!”

“I think you’re right, buddy,” Piccolo said, trying to muster some enthusiasm when all he felt was despair.

Gohan might not have noticed how Vegeta’s scent—all of his scent—was on Piccolo, but the other, new Saiyan did. The purple-haired boy turned to Piccolo and took a few sniffs. He canted his head to the side in confusion, staring at Piccolo. Piccolo’s mate-crazies threatened, prowling around the periphery of his sanity, as he registered the look on the boy’s face: disbelief. Like the boy couldn’t imagine Vegeta mating with Piccolo. Coupling with Piccolo. Letting Piccolo fuck him. Piccolo’s lip curled up in a snarl as the boy stared at him with wide eyes.

“What the fuck are you looking at kid?” Piccolo bit out.

“Oh! Uh, nothing. Sorry. I…I’ve never seen a, um, a Namek,” the boy spluttered.

“Now you have, so mind your own fucking business,” Piccolo growled. Yet the boy glanced furtively at him whenever he thought Piccolo’s mind was elsewhere.

Vegeta returned after a long while and he clearly had the forethought to clean himself off. He barely had a whiff of Piccolo about him, and even that trace was probably from when Piccolo had come in his mouth. Piccolo knew that was wise, but all Piccolo felt was shame. Shame that Vegeta didn’t want anyone to know they were mates. Shame that Vegeta thought him weak enough to be a liability. Piccolo wanted to go destroy shit. His teeth ground as the stupid Saiyan kid once again stared at Vegeta in awe and fascination.

_Stop fretting, my heart_ , Vegeta’s voice said in Piccolo’s mind. Piccolo could tell his mate was exhausted by their telepathy, and probably from dealing with Piccolo’s mate-crazies. Vegeta wasn’t used to being the calmer of the two.

Piccolo said nothing. He was too angry to say anything to anyone. He wanted to lay waste to everything he could see, including all the idiots that surrounded them. The fools that kept Vegeta from openly acknowledging Piccolo as his mate. The whole fucking reason that stupid boy thought Vegeta was open for business.

Piccolo hunched up in his floating lotus, wrapping his cape around himself. He sought peace in blanking his mind. Piccolo was good at meditating. He practiced a lot, as it was the only way he’d ever found to get through all the rage and disappointment he’d felt in his life. But now he couldn’t get that shame out of his mind. It pulsed, brighter than any other thing in his brain.

Piccolo felt Vegeta’s love force its way into his mind. Vegeta, nearby, almost trembled at the exertion of forcing his way through Piccolo’s mental barriers. _Get out of my fucking head,_ Piccolo warned Vegeta.

_Stop thinking I’m ashamed of you. It pisses me off,_ Vegeta snapped.

Piccolo ignored his little mate as more pressing matters arrived. Goku’s ship landed. Piccolo grimaced at Goku’s likely suppressed chi. Vegeta was going to lose his shit. Goku had grown even more ridiculously powerful in his long absence.

Vegeta’s state of mind immediately turned into a dumpster fire. One loud and smelly enough that Piccolo could barely keep it from invading his own mind. _Vegeta, for fuck’s sake, calm down. You knew_.

_I don’t have to fucking like it_. 

Piccolo sighed. He wished he could just hold Vegeta. Just kiss him and distract him from this torture. He wished his mate could let go of Goku being stronger. But Vegeta wasn't there yet.


	7. Betrayed by the Future

Piccolo's mouth fell open at the words he heard spilling out of that fucking child. Piccolo looked over the lavender-haired, blue-eyed boy more carefully. Now that he knew, he could see it. Vegeta’s comment about the boy’s scent made sense now. Of course Vegeta would find his own fucking _son’s_ scent unappealing. And that explained why the little fucker kept gaping at Vegeta. Piccolo tried to control his breathing as he barricaded the awful truth away in his mind where Vegeta wouldn’t see it.

Vegeta knew Piccolo was distressed, but Piccolo’s telepathic wiles were far beyond Vegeta’s and he cast aside his mate’s attempts to infiltrate his thoughts like they were nothing. _Now you know how I feel when we fucking train_ , Piccolo said with a grim smirk.

_My heart, what is—why?_ Vegeta asked, but Piccolo said nothing in response. He only fortified that corner of his mind. He finished listening to what the little fucking betrayal said to Goku. Piccolo’s teeth hurt from clenching. Then it was over and the little shit got back in his strange ship and left. Left Piccolo in the rubble of the only thing he thought was unshakeable in his entire life.

Piccolo’s eyes cut to Vegeta, his throat filling with vomit as he pictured Vegeta rutting on Bulma from behind. Pictured Bulma loving it as Vegeta slammed into her, holding her hips, bruising her delicate human flesh with even his gentlest touch. Piccolo swallowed the bile and tried to push that away. 

Vegeta’s eyes held his in complete confusion. _Vku-karam? Why…why are you looking at me like that? I don't understand!_

Piccolo’s eyes found Bulma, wondering if already she was plotting her own betrayal of Piccolo. He thought she was his friend. His heart thundered as he choked back the tears that threatened. He didn’t cry. It wasn’t like him. Vegeta was the one who cried. Piccolo raged. 

Piccolo coolly assessed Bulma, even though he’d never been very sexually attracted to women, he could see her appeal. She had lush, perky tits, and a narrow waist—Piccolo could probably wrap his hand halfway around that narrow waist. Her plump, round ass begged to be grabbed. Her face was pretty too, Piccolo supposed. Piccolo wondered idly what pussy tasted like, what he could do to Bulma with his tongue. Piccolo could see how Vegeta would leave him for that package. Bulma clearly wasn’t barren, unlike Piccolo. 

Piccolo turned away from all the faces staring at him as he related the boy’s relevant information about the androids. “Pretty fucking dumb he told you, Goku, since you couldn’t remember more than two minutes.”

“Heh,” Goku said and rubbed the back of his neck, “I just got distracted when he told me that—“

“Shut up, you fucking idiot!” Piccolo snarled.

Goku covered his mouth with both hands and nodded. Piccolo wondered if there was any changing the future. Could he disrupt it if he was a better mate? If he could somehow solve their barrenness? Piccolo regarded Bulma differently for a long moment. Bulma was a scientist. What if she could help them solve the riddle? Maybe then she wouldn’t get pregnant? Piccolo’s eyes cut to Vegeta. Vegeta was too busy ranting at Goku about something to even notice that Piccolo was still very unsettled. 

Piccolo took off the minute it was clear no more information would be shared. Vegeta watched in confusion as Piccolo blasted away from him. Piccolo didn’t care. Even if the betrayal hadn’t happened yet, Piccolo couldn’t shake the hurt that knowing the boy’s origins caused. 

When they were suitably far from the others, Vegeta caught up with Piccolo and said, “Hey, stop fucking fleeing! Why are you angry? What the fuck is going on? Do you just have more mate-crazies?”

“Fuck off!”

“Piccolo!?” Vegeta said and seized his arm.

“Don’t touch me!” Piccolo snarled.

“What?!” Vegeta said with such hurt that Piccolo calmed a little.

“I just…I need time to myself! Leave me alone!” Piccolo said, trying to be less angry. He could feel Vegeta’s exhausted attempts to infiltrate his mind again, but it was nothing to redirect Vegeta, without him realizing that Piccolo was pushing him away from the heart of his misery.

Vegeta’s face twisted into a frown and he said, “My heart…are…are you still upset about that whelp? I have no interest in that little upstart, _minaiya_. Is…did I say something? It means nothing if it didn’t take—“

“Not to me! I feel your desperation constantly! I feel your need! Your despair. Your confusion. It’s horrible to always feel so fucking inadequate,” Piccolo said and took off toward their waterfall, not wanting to go anywhere near Capsule Corp until he had better control of himself.

Vegeta yanked him back against his body and said, “No! You don’t get to do that! You don’t get to just say that and run away!”

“Do you deny any of it?” Piccolo said, knowing he was maybe tearing off a scab he shouldn’t.

Vegeta looked wounded and swallowed hard, his Adam’s apple bobbing visibly. Piccolo snorted and said, “Yeah, that’s what I thought. I’m a fucking disappointment.”

Piccolo blasted Vegeta point blank so he could get away. He heard Vegeta swear as he cascaded toward the earth. Piccolo bolted into the forest, leaning back against a massive tree and suppressing his chi entirely.

Vegeta appeared in front of him within the second. “You can’t possibly think that would work on me,” Vegeta said and boxed Piccolo in with a hand on either side of him.

“Fuck you,” Piccolo said, avoiding Vegeta’s eyes.

“You’re not a disappointment, my heart. I’m _disappointed_ , but that’s different. I love you. I just…I want us to have a baby. Am I not allowed to grieve for what we lost? What we can’t seem to get back?” Vegeta said and rested his forehead on Piccolo’s chest.

Piccolo deflated, all his rage dissipating under that soft thud. Vegeta’s sadness always undid Piccolo. He encircled Vegeta with his arms and squeezed him. “Of course you’re allowed to grieve, Vegeta. I do too. Since I was the one who got pregnant before, I keep…I keep expecting it to be me, and then I don’t. I just feel like I’m letting you down.”

“You’re not. You’re my everything. I can’t help that I’m sad about it, _minaiya_ , but it doesn’t change my feelings for you. I’ve loved you from the moment I set eyes on you and nothing will change that, certainly not the misfortune of our infertility.”

Piccolo wondered if he could unmake Vegeta’s future son using Bulma in a different way. “What if…what if we ask Bulma for help? She’s a scientist. Maybe she can…I don’t know…run some tests? You know how curious she is. We could at least…at least…try,” Piccolo said, despondency engulfing him like sucking tar.

Vegeta’s eyebrows shot up and he searched Piccolo's face. It was clear he found this suggestion to be slightly out of left field. He said, “If anyone can figure it out it’s the woman. She is a genius, I’ll give her that.”

Piccolo put out feelers. He smirked and said, “You sure you don’t want to give her more than that? Because I’m pretty sure she’d like it if you gave her your perfect prick.” Every channel in his mind was open and receptive to how Vegeta actually felt about Bulma.

Vegeta gave him a wry smile and floated up to kiss him. “You might get punished for such insolence, my heart. The woman isn’t interested in me. And I only want _you._ I might have to punish you again and again.”

Piccolo laughed and pulled Vegeta tight against him and said, “I look forward to that, my prince.”

Vegeta smirked again at the epithet. They flew home hand in hand and immediately sought out Bulma. 

She looked startled to see them. “Oh, hey, you two. Did you do what I think you did out there? Naughty boys,” she said with a little chuckle.

Piccolo loved how Vegeta blushed when she said that. Piccolo nudged him and said, “I don’t know what you mean, Bulma.”

Bulma said, “Well, Vegeta does. Look at his pink cheeks. Did you get mate-crazies? Is that what brings you to my lab? What triggered it this time? I want to start tracking what triggers it. It’s just so fascinating! Maybe we can find a treatment for it.” 

“We have another scientific inquiry for you, woman,” Vegeta said in an unnecessarily hostile tone.

Piccolo wondered warily if Bulma had any inkling that the purple-haired boy was hers. The kid had been covered head to toe in Capsule Corp gear, he had Bulma’s eyes, for sure, but it was so outlandish that he couldn’t imagine such a thing occurring to anyone sane.

_What is going on with you? You look like you’re dissecting the woman_ , Vegeta said in Piccolo's mind, so tired he couldn’t do anything more than speak, so Piccolo hardly had to hide his thoughts at all.

_Nothing. She’s just…I just wondered if you ever think about her like…like_ that, _you know? Especially since we know humans are compatible with Saiyans—_

_You’re the only one I want ever! Don’t fucking doubt me. The only reason I’m not ravishing you is because this was your idea!_ Vegeta crossed his arms and huffed.

Bulma rolled her eyes. “I can tell when you guys are talking telepathically. Someday I’m going to figure out a transponder that can pick that up and decode it so I can eavesdrop.”

“You better not, or I’ll fucking destroy you. If we wanted you to know, we’d speak aloud,” Piccolo grumbled.

“Fucking rude, Piccolo. Rude to talk right in front of me, possibly about me,” Bulma said.

Vegeta said, “Enough. Woman, we are…we need…well…I…”

Piccolo cut his bumbling mate off and said, “Vegeta and I have been trying to conceive for over a year and we haven’t been able to get pregnant. We wondered if you might be able to run some tests and try to figure out why.”

Bulma’s mouth dropped open as her eyes popped nearly out of her head. She spluttered, “B…bu…but…you…you guys are…you’re…you’re both _male_!”

Piccolo dragged a hand down over his face. “No, I’m not. I’m a hermaphrodite. I can reproduce as a male or a female. I got pregnant when we first fucked, but then I got killed, so I lost it—“

“Whaaaaat?” Bulma cried, “When did you first fuck?” Bulma sank down into a chair, gripping the desk like she might float away.

“While we waited for Kakarot to show up the first day I arrived on Earth. I found Piccolo irresistible, so I called a halt to the fighting and he and I flew off to ‘fight’ one on one,” Vegeta said, and he paused to look Piccolo up and down lasciviously, “We mated. He got pregnant, and then my idiot comrade murdered him. Very distressing all around.”

“So, hold up, okay,” Bulma said and pressed her fingertips to the spot between her eyebrows, “You got pregnant the very first time you two fucked, but not since then?”

“That’s right. It makes no sense. Either of us can become pregnant, so why haven’t we?” Vegeta said, his posture rigid and his ass taut and beautiful. Piccolo could almost feel the phantom squeeze of Vegeta’s tail around his thigh in that pose.

Bulma’s eyes bugged out again. “You…you can get pregnant, Vegeta? What? How? Do you…do you have both?”

“Both what?” Vegeta said.

“Like a dick and a pussy?” Bulma whispered.

“No, but I do have a womb. Saiyan males are different than human males in that regard, but I get pregnant through my ass,” Vegeta said, his eyebrows crashing together, clearly confused why Bulma was so bashful about his parts.

Bulma gaped and said, “Holy shit. This is so interesting. So…you guys are having trouble conceiving? But you’re not miscarrying? Like just not getting pregnant? Do you have cycles?”

Vegeta looked to Piccolo and said, _Cycles of what?_

_How the hell should I know_? Piccolo answered Vegeta and then said aloud to Bulma, “What does that mean?”

“Like heats. Do you go into heat or menstruate?”

They glanced at each other and shrugged. Bulma explained and Vegeta’s face seemed to settle into understanding. He said, “I have wondered why you smelled wounded on a regular basis, but showed no signs of a fight. It makes sense now. No. That is not part of Saiyans’ fertility.”

“Nope, me neither. Nameks are perpetually fertile. Well. Except me, apparently,” Piccolo said, despairing that Bulma would be able to help when he was obviously so biologically distinct from humans.

“Hey, honey, don’t look so down. I’m on the case now, we’ll figure it all out. But you two will have to work on your mate-crazy bullshit, because I’m going to have to examine both of you…you know…intimately,” Bulma said and a flush crept across her cheeks.

Vegeta smirked and said, “I think you rather like that idea, woman.”

Piccolo’s jealousy flared like accelerant on a fire. He tamped down his impulse to tackle Vegeta and fuck him right in front of Bulma to make sure she knew Vegeta belonged to Piccolo. Vegeta eyeballed him and said, “Settle down, my heart, I’m only teasing her.”

“I can’t believe you’d fucking say that after…after what I told you!” Piccolo resented Vegeta’s flippant attitude about Piccolo’s fears, which made sense if he was going to get a son one way or another. If Piccolo had hackles, they would have risen.

Bulma said, “Wait, what? What did he tell you?”

Vegeta turned toward her, blinking slowly, like a predator deciding whether it wanted to take down a piece of prey. “Piccolo thinks you have the hots for me.”

“What, no, no, no…” Bulma said, her cheeks flaming now, deep red and her eyes dodging away from Piccolo’s, trying to surreptitiously read Vegeta’s expression.

Piccolo loomed over Bulma and growled, “I like you, Bulma, so I don’t want to murder you, but know that I will if you even fantasize about my mate.”

“Oh, come off it, Piccolo, probably every woman that lays eyes on Vegeta without a shirt fantasizes a _little_. Same goes for you, big guy. Your body fuels certain thoughts. And that dangerous, fanged half-smile of yours,” Bulma said, and the saucy woman trailed her forefinger right up Piccolo’s chest where his gi was open, and she quipped his chin.

Vegeta positively gawked and Piccolo enjoyed making him jealous for once. Vegeta got hit on regularly, but Piccolo rarely did. Being a gay, green behemoth tended to put women off. Men never came onto Piccolo anymore thanks to Vegeta’s ominous presence when they were out. Any man with two ounces of sense wouldn’t bother hitting on Piccolo with his pit bull of a mate at his side, no mating marks or olfactory ability necessary.

Vegeta said, “Hands off or I’ll take your hand off, and I imagine you don’t regenerate like a Namek.”

“So tetchy, Vegeta. So what if I enjoy examining both of you? I find it fascinating, aside from my curiosity about what you’re both packing south of the border. If you’re all mated and shit, it won’t matter how I feel, right?” Bulma said, crossing her arms and raising an eyebrow at Vegeta in challenge. 

Vegeta sputtered, “Yes…I…still…I…he’s _vkai_!” 

“I don’t know what that means, but I assume it’s some possessive nonsense.” Bulma flapped her hand at Vegeta, as if his feelings and words were pointless. “Who wants to go first? Do you think it’ll be easier or harder if you're in the room together?”

“Not without me. Never without me. I need to be here,” Vegeta snarled.

“Why do I have to go first? It’s…I’m more alien. You should go first, Vegeta!” Piccolo said, his whole face burned at the thought of Bulma spreading him out and poking around in his _theadur_.

“Very well, _minaiya_ , but I still wish to stay in the room when she examines you. What’s required, woman?” Vegeta said, but kept his eyes on Piccolo and whispered, _I think it maybe turns me on a bit to think of her spreading you out and looking at every perfect inch of you._

Piccolo covered his face with his hand to hide what he imagined was a deep purple blush. Bulma saw and said, “What? What did he say that’s making you blush like a schoolgirl?”

“Nothing. Just tell Vegeta what to do. Let’s get this infertility-solving-party started,” Piccolo muttered and pulled his hand away from his face to see Vegeta was at half-mast. “Godsdamnit, Vegeta, seriously!?”

Vegeta shrugged. Bulma followed Piccolo’s eyes and laughed. “Oh Kami, you two! Vegeta! Do you just fuck constantly?”

Vegeta gave her his most delicious smirk and said, “We take breaks to eat. Sometimes to train.”

Heat roared across Piccolo’s cheeks again. Vegeta continued, “Do you need a sperm sample, woman, because we’d happily furnish one from each of us.”

“Um, yeah, actually, that’s a good starting point. Um, do…do you…maybe not in my lab, though. You want to meet me back here after you…get your samples,” Bulma said, in a perpetual blush, but Piccolo heard her heart thundering and from the way Vegeta flehmened, Piccolo assumed she smelled horny.

_Indeed she does_ , Vegeta confirmed. It did nothing to allay Piccolo’s worries about his mate throwing him over for something prettier and more breedable. Vegeta growled mentally and continued, _Stop thinking I’m going to cheat on you. It insults me_.

_Well, you’ve practically gotten a hard-on thinking about her examining you!_ Piccolo said and tears threatened again.

“Can we just have a ‘no telepathy around Bulma’ rule? Because it is seriously fucking annoying!” 

“No, woman, _we_ can’t have anything, because there is no we, not as you imagine in your triangular fantasies, in any case,” Vegeta snapped.

Bulma put her hands on her hips and said, “If you really want my help, I’m going to have to be pretty involved in your damn sex-life and your bodies, so maybe there’s a little bit of _we_ , don’t you think, Vegeta? Don’t you want my help? There is nothing in this for me, so don’t be a jerk!”

“We’ll do our best, Bulma, sometimes we’re just…you know…um…it’s not…it’s not really talking so much as just…um…” Piccolo stalled out, wishing he’d just said they’d stop.

“Oh my gods, you two! So you’re just saying dirty shit to each other! Maybe you’re having too much sex and that’s why you can’t get pregnant!” Bulma said with a big open-mouthed laugh.

Vegeta glanced at Piccolo with a worried expression and he said, “I…I don’t think that’s a thing that troubles Saiyans…Do…If humans couple too frequently, does it, does it really prevent pregnancy?”

“No, Vegeta, I’m just teasing you two! I didn’t realize you guys were, you know, so, um…active?” Bulma said.

“Do you think about Piccolo and I having sex often, woman?” Vegeta said with a dark smirk.

“You are such a jerk!” she said and swatted his arm as she got up to root around in a cabinet full of beakers and test tubes and other containers. “Here we go!” She held up two small plastic cups with lids. She found a marker and wrote “Piccolo” on one, and “Vegeta” on the other. “You boys can go have fun, but I need it fresh, so no laying around cuddling afterwards, if that’s a thing you two animals do.”

Piccolo bristled and snapped, “We’re not animals!”

“Picc, honey, I just meant you’re animals in the bedroom—means you fuck like crazy,” she said with a wink and she squeezed his bicep. Vegeta’s pupils dilated watching that, but Piccolo was both intrigued and irritated that his little mate didn’t get mate-crazy at this intrusion on his territory.

Vegeta swatted Piccolo’s ass and growled, “Come on, my heart." He tugged Piccolo up the stairs out of the lab. Once they were in the hallway, headed toward their rooms, Vegeta looked Piccolo over and said, “Gods, I can’t wait for her to examine you.”

“Gross! Why?!” Piccolo said, his face pinching up in distaste.

“I like showing off what’s mine. You’re beautiful, inside and out, _minaiya_.”

“I am _not_ looking forward to being examined or her touching you. You’re mine and it pisses me off the way she looks at you!” Piccolo hissed.

“Since when are you so jealous of the woman? You’ve never said a thing about her before. You spend far more time with her than I do,” Vegeta said, and Piccolo felt his mate try to infiltrate his mind.

“Stay out of my fucking head!” Piccolo snapped.

“You don’t stay out of mine!” Vegeta said and slammed Piccolo against the wall inside their living room. Capsule Corp’s residential wings had several nice, fully furnished apartments. Piccolo expected a small bedroom when Bulma offered Vegeta lodging, but it was their own home. Vegeta ripped Piccolo’s clothes off and started furiously pumping Piccolo’s cock. “Are you fucking the woman? Is that what this is about? Projection? You are _vkai_!” Vegeta bit out and roughly fingered Piccolo’s sheath.

“Fuck, baby, you’re…godsdamnit! No, of course I’m not fucking Bulma! I’ve never fucked a woman _at all_. I don’t want to fuck Bulma! I just…seeing that…that kid, seeing a demi-Saiyan boy made my mind…go to a dark place,” Piccolo panted out. He hated that Vegeta could bring him almost to climax even when Piccolo was actively trying not to come. Piccolo tried to squeeze his legs shut.

“No you don’t, my heart. You’re going to come for me and you’re going to remember that I want only you. That you are my only. And you’re going to stop being crazy about the woman. Right?”

“Vegeta…” Piccolo moaned and Vegeta sent a bolt of chi into his sheath. Piccolo came hard, curling down over Vegeta’s two busy hands.

“That’s right, _vku-karam_. There, do you feel better? Was this lingering mate-crazies?”

Piccolo wanted to tell Vegeta. Wanted to tell him what he’d heard that little purple-haired fucker say. He wanted Vegeta to reassure him that it would never happen. But of course Vegeta would say that. The boy hadn’t happened _yet._ Vegeta’s desperation over their inability to get pregnant clearly hadn’t reached that point just yet. Piccolo’s only hope was Bulma. If she could fix Piccolo, then he wouldn’t lose Vegeta to her. But what if Bulma already wanted Vegeta enough to sabotage Piccolo’s efforts at getting pregnant? What if her “examinations” led to Vegeta leaving him?

Piccolo burst into tears before he was even through the final tremors of his orgasm. Vegeta’s face collapsed. “Piccolo! Fucking hell, are…did…did you really not want me to touch you? I’m sorry! I’m sorry, my heart!” Vegeta burned Piccolo’s semen off his hand with chi and clutched Piccolo’s face. “Piccolo, please…what…what is happening?”

Piccolo shook his head, but couldn’t speak. He pulled Vegeta into his arms and hugged him tightly, burying his face in Vegeta’s neck. “Please don’t leave me, Vegeta,” Piccolo wept.

“What? I’m never going to leave you, Piccolo. Where is this coming from? Good gods, this is the worst they’ve ever been. Come on, my heart, do you want to fuck me? That makes me feel better when they really get red,” Vegeta said, looking into Piccolo’s eyes. Piccolo knew they wouldn’t have the red glaze they got in the throes of mate-crazies. “Piccolo…” Vegeta searched his eyes.

“I’m okay, baby. I’m sorry. I…it’s really getting to me that I can’t get pregnant, that’s all. Seeing that stupid fucking kid just made me so mad that I can’t give that to you when stupid Goku probably pumps a kid in ChiChi every time they have sex,” Piccolo said and chuckled.

“Well, then I imagine he’ll just have the one,” Vegeta said and they laughed harder. “I grieve for us, Piccolo, but nothing, I mean it, nothing will change how I feel about you. Ever. Don’t doubt me. Don’t doubt my love. Or I’ll fuck you into the ground.”

Piccolo smirked and kissed Vegeta. As he carried him to the bedroom, he purred, “That’s not a lot of incentive to not doubt you and your love, baby. I like it when you fuck me into the ground.”

Vegeta chuckled. He kissed Piccolo and said, “Do you want to get the samples to the woman and then we can spend the day properly fucking one another into the ground before we begin training for these mythological androids? I have to become super Saiyan. I can’t stand the stupid clown being _this_ much stronger than me.”

Piccolo set Vegeta down to undress him, and then tossed him on the bed. “Samples, then I’m going to feed you before you get crabby, and _then_ you can fuck me into the ground and vice versa, yeah?”

“Yes, _minaiya_ , that sounds like an excellent plan,” Vegeta said.

Vegeta smirked as Piccolo took hold of his cock and said, “Nothing sexier than a plastic cup by your dick, huh, baby?”

“You know I like a challenge, my heart,” Vegeta said, unscrewing the lid. They laughed and tumbled into each other’s arms, kissing, and touching, and for a while, Piccolo forgot the purple-haired betrayal. He forgot that there was anything else in the world but Vegeta.


	8. Examination

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alien sex stuff ahead!

Piccolo was relieved that Bulma said she should run some tests on their semen before anything else. She said that there was no point in delving further if it was a semen issue. Piccolo tried to settle down, but Vegeta had the scent of his misery. Piccolo walled off his fear as best he could, but occasionally he still snapped.

Vegeta tried to soothe him via sex, but Vegeta was also wrapped up in his quest to become super Saiyan, so most of his prodding at Piccolo was in their evenings together. Piccolo’s secret stayed safe thanks to Vegeta’s exhaustion and his obsessive focus on besting Goku. Piccolo, as a result, and not without ironic amusement, spent a lot of time with Bulma.

Piccolo trained, but he wasn’t like Vegeta. Since it became clear that he would never actually be the best or the strongest again, some of his drive to train had dried up. He still trained a decent portion of every day, especially with Gohan, and sometimes with Goku, much to Vegeta’s chagrin, but then he would loiter around Bulma’s lab. Piccolo, if he was being honest, could see how Vegeta would leave him for Bulma. She was fun and beautiful and smart. 

They brainstormed about his and Vegeta’s infertility. Bulma hadn’t examined them yet, though she’d done several different types of imaging on both of them. Piccolo appreciated that she really seemed to be throwing all her intellectual gifts into solving the problem. It impressed Piccolo that she could be so completely disgusting and disorganized, but rigorous and methodical in her research. He’d seen her notes and he wondered if she used up all her organizational skills and tidiness there. Her research revealed how she was able to come up with so many marvels.

After another year of barrenness and failure, Piccolo laid on his back on a cluttered countertop near her computer station keeping Bulma company. He used chi to gradually tidy while he bantered with her. She was processing something for some new alloy to strengthen the gravity room for Vegeta, so she was mostly killing time, which meant she was chatty. 

It hadn’t escaped Piccolo’s notice that she had gotten touchier with him over the previous year. She cleared a spot on the counter and sprawled out in the opposite direction of him, but her head was right next to his. They could have turned and kissed. The thought made his chest hurt at what that would do to his little mate. That was what his mate would do to him sometime soon, that and more.

Piccolo said, trying to sound casual, “Why haven’t you examined us? It’s been forever and you haven’t done it.”

Her hand came up and trailed over his skull, deftly avoiding his antennae. The touch felt sensual to Piccolo, like Bulma enjoyed touching him. Piccolo swallowed hard. He didn’t want to lose his only real friend, but he didn’t want to hurt his mate. He didn’t want his mate to hurt him.

Bulma said, “I’m scared to do it.”

“Because of the mate-crazies?” Piccolo said, almost rolling his head to face her.

“No…no…I’ve got the tranq gun if that becomes an issue.”

“Scared that it will be the end of the line? That it will yield nothing?” Piccolo asked.

“No. Not that either. I’m…well…the three of us spend a lot of time together, you know? And me and you hang out all the time,” Bulma said.

“Yeah, we do. I’m sure Vegeta would hang out with us more if he wasn’t so insane because Goku’s still stronger than he is. Why does that make you scared? I would think that would make you trust us _more_ not to eviscerate you.”

“Picc, gods, I expect you to be less obtuse than him. I…well…I…I mean, I just, I’m already feeling…confused. I know you two are mated. I do. But I think if I examine you guys, I will want what I can’t have even more,” Bulma said, her voice transparent it was so soft. It was almost down at Namek-only range.

Piccolo pushed up and looked down at her. “Bulma?”

“Oh come on, you can’t pretend you don’t know. I know it’s completely one-sided,” she said, her eyes darting away from his.

So she was already after Vegeta. Piccolo hissed, “Stay away from him! Don’t doubt that I will wreck you if you try for him, Bulma!”

Now she sat up and stared unflinchingly into his eyes. “You _are_ as fucking obtuse as him. Gods. Not just _him_ , Picc! Don’t you…I mean…I know you guys are mated, but—“

“Vegeta is _mine_!” Piccolo said and burst into tears, “Please don’t take him from me. Oh gods, please, please, Bulma, please don’t take him from me!”

Bulma wrapped around Piccolo with her soft, supple arms and crooned, “What are you talking about, you big idiot? I’m not taking anyone. I’m not stupid enough to believe that’s a possibility anyway. I just already have crushes on both of you, so the thought of looking at both of you guys like that, I just think…I think it will be hard for me.”

Piccolo yanked out of her arms. “You have a crush on _me_?”

“Uh, yeah, you big dope,” Bulma said and laid her head on his shoulder.

Vegeta stormed into the lab, chi balls in both hands. “Get off my mate, woman, or I’ll end you!” he roared.

Piccolo shoved Bulma behind himself. “Vegeta, knock it off. She’s not…it’s…it’s not like that.”

Vegeta’s fury collapsed into tears and he fell to his knees. “Oh gods, are you…are you in love with her?”

“What?” Piccolo said, walking over and pulling Vegeta to his feet.

“You’re always with her and then…then today, your chi went crazy and I find you in her arms! How…how could you do this to me?!” Vegeta sobbed out.

“Oh, yeah, sure, pretend I’m gonna fuck her. Because _that’s_ why you have a fucking _kid_ with her, because _I_ fall for her. Fuck you!” Piccolo bit out and realized too late what he’d just revealed to both of them. Piccolo tried to flee, but Vegeta’s vise grip on his wrist was unbreakable.

Vegeta growled, “No! You don’t get to run away from saying that fucked up bullshit! _You_ are the only one I fuck, the only one I ever want to fuck—“

“Yeah, well tell that to the purple-haired abomination from the future! You must get tired of waiting to have a baby, so you looked for more fertile fields to plow!” Piccolo snarled, trying to claw Vegeta’s hand off him.

“You are talking nonsense, my heart. I don’t even understand what you’re accusing me of doing!” Vegeta said with wide eyes. “I caught you in the woman’s arms and you’re saying _I_ cheated? What the _fuck_ , Piccolo!?”

Piccolo couldn’t contain it any longer. He told them both everything that he’d heard that horrible day. He told them both that they would have a son together. A strong, demi-Saiyan son who would save them all. Piccolo sobbed uncontrollably. Vegeta held him, kissing his arm, and reassured him that it wouldn’t happen. Bulma looked stunned. Her hand kept floating toward her belly, like she already had the little punk in her womb.

A horrible alternative thought occurred to Piccolo and he screeched, “Did you use his sperm sample!?”

Bulma canted her head to the side and said, “For what? I ran a bunch of tests on it. It’s different than human semen, but it seemed normal and fully functional—“

“Did you test its fucking _functionality_ in your own womb?!” Piccolo snapped.

Bulma’s mouth dropped open and she laughed. “Uh, no, definitely not. I don’t want a kid right now. I’m in my prime. I’m not sure I want kids at all. I don’t know if I even believe that kid’s story. Vegeta is a lot of shitty things, Piccolo—“

Vegeta interrupted, “Hey! What the hell, woman! I’m—“

“Shut up, Vegeta. Disloyal is not one of Vegeta’s shitty qualities. I agree with him, that you’re being ridiculous. Are you stressed about this because I haven't examined you? If so, let’s do it. Right now. Let’s see what’s going on between those big, powerful thighs, honey,” Bulma said. She disappeared into one of the massive, mysterious storage rooms in the Capsule Corp basement.

Piccolo’s stomach churned and flip-flopped as she wheeled out a stirruped examination table. She rummaged more until she found a big lamp. She rounded up a whole tray of instruments and Piccolo marveled that she seemed to know where everything was in the complete disarray of her big lab and all the different storage areas. She glared at Piccolo and said, “Now. Let’s do this. Is that why you’ve been so weird about me and Vegeta? Have you just been hanging out with me to make sure I didn’t seduce him or some shit?”

Piccolo’s brows crashed together and he was surprised how much the statement hurt. He said, “I hang out with you because I thought you were my fucking _friend_. I thought you cared about me the way I care about you! Maybe I was wrong. Maybe I’m just a fucking _stepping-stone_.”

Bulma’s eyes filled with tears and she jabbed a finger at him. “You _are_ my friend! You’re the one with the fucking complex and if you’d told us a _year_ ago what you’d heard, both of us probably could have reassured you that it’s never going to happen, Piccolo. Why did you keep it secret?”

“Because I didn’t want to accidentally make it happen!” Piccolo said and tears threatened again.

Vegeta cut in, “I don’t think this is an advisable time to do an exam, woman. Piccolo’s clearly upset, as are you, and I…I am shocked. Confused. And…I…I can’t believe you kept this from me, my heart.”

“Really? If you saw a kid of mine with someone else, but it hadn’t happened, what would you do?” Piccolo said, stepping toward the unsettling table.

Vegeta’s eyes cut away and he grimaced. “Fine, yes, I see your point. But…but surely the woman can…can figure out what’s wrong with us?” Vegeta’s face turned so hopeful that Piccolo melted.

“Oh, baby, come here,” Piccolo said and pulled Vegeta into his arms. Vegeta hugged him and Piccolo continued, “Okay, yeah, I bet she can. But then we should get this part over with, right?” Vegeta nodded into Piccolo’s chest. “Can you keep your mate-crazies at bay?”

“Yes, I believe so,” Vegeta said.

Bulma waggled the tranq gun in the air and said, “Well, I’m not taking any chances when I go into Piccolo’s business.”

Piccolo's heart thundered in his ears and he stammered, “Actually, um…maybe…yeah, I don’t think…this might not be a good idea.” Piccolo had never been ashamed of his body or even embarrassed about it. Any modesty he had was primarily due to humans freaking out about nudity. It was more that he didn’t know _what_ he would feel with Bulma between his legs and Vegeta watching.

“Oh come on, don’t be a ninny, Picc, get undressed and get on the table,” Bulma said, scrubbing her hands in the sink before snapping on a pair of nitrile gloves.

Piccolo glanced at Vegeta. Vegeta said, _Go on, my heart, it will be fine. Maybe there’s something obvious._

Piccolo shed his gi and watched as Vegeta’s tight training shorts got tighter, his eyes roaming over Piccolo. Piccolo willed his dick not to get hard. “Vegeta…I’ve never, um, nobody else has…has touched me there, so I don’t, uh, I don’t know, you know…” Piccolo rambled, worried about what Vegeta would say or do if Piccolo admitted his real fear.

Vegeta’s sexy smirk didn't help Piccolo’s concerns. “ _Minaiya_ , are you worried you’ll get a hard-on when the woman touches you?” Vegeta adjusted his own obvious erection, letting his fingers linger.

"Stop that!” Piccolo said, his cock stirring. “Don’t make this weird, Vegeta!”

“It’s already _weird_ , the woman obviously wants to fuck you—“

“She does not!” Piccolo squeaked.

“Uh, I kind of do,” Bulma said, “Just cards on the table. I think maybe going forward would be easier if we’re at least up front about these things, right?”

Vegeta raised an eyebrow and said, “And I bet she _would_ fuck me if I asked nicely, so I think ‘weird’ is already firmly entrenched.”

“Still, baby, could you not…not _try_ to turn me on?” Piccolo said, but it was too late. Piccolo liked imagining the three of them. He didn’t like the idea of Bulma having Vegeta, but he couldn’t deny that the idea of the threesome was titillating.

Piccolo sat on the edge of the table with his hands over his dick. Bulma raised and eyebrow at him as she turned on the lamp. “Picc, honey, the stirrups aren’t for show. You’re going to have to saddle up if we’re going to do this.”

“I…” Piccolo’s voice trailed into a squeak. 

Vegeta came over and moved Piccolo until he was laying back. “Legs up, my heart. Let’s let her do her magic. I’m right here, so I’ll keep you from giving in to your baser urges,” Vegeta said with a smirk.

Piccolo covered his face, inadvertently revealing his prick. “Vegeta! Don’t be mean!” he cried.

Bulma’s eyebrows shot up. “Jeez, Picc, you’re packing heat there.”

“I’m seven and half feet tall! It’s proportional!” Piccolo said, unsure why he was feeling insulted that she said his prick was big. “Did you think I’d have a small dick?!”

“No, definitely not, but…I’ve never seen…well…um…jeez. What’s it like when it’s hard?” she said and seemed genuinely curious, not even in a sexual way, but a scientific way. 

Piccolo’s hand snapped out and grabbed Vegeta’s as he tried to touch Piccolo’s cock. “You are not doing that, Vegeta!”

“Oh come on, _minaiya_ , it’s for science,” Vegeta said, his eyes glittering.

“You are making all of this extra weird, Vegeta!”

“I don’t think it’s that weird that she wants to see your cock in all its glory, Piccolo. It’s a fantastic dick,” Vegeta said with a shrug and idly swirled his fingertip around Piccolo’s nipple.

“Vegeta! Stop!” Piccolo snarled. Vegeta bent and kissed him. Piccolo tried to resist, whispering, “Knock it off,” against Vegeta’s lips.

“I don’t want to, I want to watch her touch you. It will be more fun if you’re hard,” Vegeta said, his hand drifting down Piccolo’s torso again.

Bulma’s lust was unmistakable now and Piccolo squeezed his eyes shut as his dick stirred to life. It wasn’t hard yet, but if Vegeta kept up his exhibitionist nonsense, Piccolo would lose the battle. Bulma squeezed Piccolo’s knees and said, “Come on, up in the stirrups. You laying around naked certainly isn’t making me feel _more_ scientific.”

“What…um…I…what are you going to do?” Piccolo said.

Bulma walked him through her plan, showing him the instruments. When she held up a tube of lube he said, “No, not necessary, that’s not how _theadurs_ work. They aren’t like pussies or asses. You…” Piccolo’s cheeks burned and he glanced at Vegeta. 

Vegeta’s grin grew and he said, “I think Piccolo was going to say that you can take your glove off to feel it if you want. It’s unique, the lining. There’s nothing else like it,” Vegeta said, and that was the end of Vegeta’s half-mast. Piccolo shut his eyes tightly, but it was too late. He saw Vegeta's glorious erection and Piccolo’s cock never resisted Vegeta’s prick.

Even Piccolo could smell Bulma’s arousal and it did not encourage him to put his feet up in the stirrups, but Vegeta’s hands slid along the length of his legs and put one foot in a stirrup and then the other. Piccolo’s knees were still tight together, but Vegeta eased them apart. “Come on, my heart, maybe she’ll figure it out.”

Piccolo dared to open his eyes. Bulma and Vegeta were both flushed. Bulma’s eyes were on Piccolo’s cock, unabashedly admiring it. Piccolo nodded at Vegeta and relaxed his legs, opening them for Bulma. He reached down and pulled his balls up, running his forefinger along the tightly closed slit of his _theadur_ and said, “This is it. You won’t hurt it, but it takes a bit of force to…penetrate…it.”

Bulma nodded and Piccolo winced at the cold metal touching him. Bulma adjusted the lamp and sat on the low stool. She said, “Whoa! Look at that color!”

Piccolo trembled as more things touched him in a place that only Vegeta ever had. Bulma’s skin still hadn’t, however, and that was something of a relief to Piccolo. Vegeta’s eyelids fell heavily with lust and he purred, “Can I look inside you, my heart?”

Bulma said, “Oh, yeah, sure, come down here, Vegeta.”

“No, uh-uh, I—“ Piccolo protested, but once Vegeta was between his legs, even before he sat on the short stool, Piccolo’s voice died. Vegeta’s face turned him on so much that he worried if either of them touched him internally, he would come. “Vegeta…”

Vegeta dropped lower and kissed the inside of Piccolo’s thighs, so close to his crotch that Piccolo shivered. Bulma watched, the scent of arousal rippling off her in heavy waves. Vegeta murmured, “ _Minaiya_ , I think it would be useful for the woman to see a _theadur_ orgasm.”

“Vegeta! Fuck! No! Don’t…don’t do that!” Piccolo said, but the heavy drop in his belly told him that his body was more compliant with Vegeta than with its owner.

“Woman?” Vegeta said, his fingers grazing the skin around the edge of the speculum. Vegeta turned to look at Bulma.

Bulma’s eyes met Piccolo’s. Her chest rose and fell fast as her breathing quickened. “I…I think we…Piccolo, it’s, um, it’s up to Piccolo.”

Vegeta’s lust-hazy gaze fell on Piccolo. “I think if there’s any chance it has some bearing on fertility, you ought to see what it does when he comes.”

“Vegeta!” Piccolo hissed. He was so turned on it was embarrassing. Piccolo didn’t understand how it could feel this way. He didn’t understand _wanting_ Bulma to tip him over the edge while Vegeta watched his insides like an extremely close-up porno.

Vegeta slithered up his body, grinding their cocks together on his way to kiss Piccolo. “Let her. I want to watch.”

“Fucking gods, Vegeta, isn’t this…weird?”

“I don’t care if it is. I’m at the edge of my control just from looking at you prostrate like this. Maybe she’ll let me fuck you in the stirrups,” Vegeta whispered.

Bulma flushed deep red and stammered, “I…um…it…yeah…maybe let me finish the exam and then…then I could look to see if…if anything happens once there’s…there’s...um, you know, semen, in there.”

Vegeta's face was pure triumph and Piccolo said, _Why are you doing this_?

_Because we all want it. I love bringing you pleasure, and you may be embarrassed, but your body isn’t. Plus I agree with her that it might also prove scientifically useful._ Vegeta moved off the stool and Bulma sat back down. He leaned down to watch as she did whatever she was doing. Vegeta purred in her ear, “Take your glove off. Touch him. I know you want him, I can smell it.”

Bulma’s eyelids fluttered as she met Piccolo’s eyes as she looked up the length of his torso. Piccolo swallowed and breathed, “You can…if you want…”

There was a soft snapping sound as Bulma removed her gloves. Piccolo felt her delicate hand trail up the inside of his trembling thigh. Her knuckles grazed around the opening. Vegeta’s eyes were riveted to what she was doing. Piccolo briefly imagined his little mate’s strong hands sliding down over Bulma’s shoulders onto her breasts, touching her nipples, twisting them until she cried out as she pushed her fingers inside Piccolo. 

Vegeta smirked at him and said, “My heart, so naughty.”

Bulma whispered, “What? What did he say?”

“He was thinking about me touching you while you touch him,” Vegeta bent lower so his lips were almost on her ear. “He imagined me palming those lush breasts of yours, playing with your nipples.”

Piccolo’s eyes darted to Bulma’s. Her mouth hung open and her eyes were wide. Vegeta poked around in Piccolo’s mind. Piccolo felt they were already treading in gray territory, and he and Vegeta were both…excited. Bulma was too.

Bulma said, “I…um…we…if…I’ve never done anything like this…but…I…I would…” Bulma’s breathing became ragged and erratic as she waited.

Vegeta murmured, “What do you think, my heart? Would that help you relax? Hmm?”

“I…are you sure, baby?” Piccolo said, terrified that he was throwing away the best thing in his life for a bit of kink.

“Piccolo, I’ll always love you. You’re always my mate. Always. No matter what. The woman knows that,” Vegeta said, his eyes burning into Piccolo’s.

Piccolo said, “Okay, baby,” and spread his legs a little wider. 

Bulma put both her hands on him, exploring his exterior. “Vegeta…can I…can I touch him, touch him?”

Vegeta nipped her ear, making her gasp. “Only with me. Only when I’m here, or I will kill you, do you understand?”

Piccolo didn’t know what to make of the fact that this seemed to titillate Bulma more. She nodded and said, “Honey?”

“Are we just having a threesome? Can I just clarify?” Piccolo said, almost panting himself.

Vegeta said, “Well, why not? Then the woman gets to come too.”

Piccolo nodded and said, “Okay, Bulma, you can do what you want.”

Bulma grinned and her hands grew bolder, sliding up the length of his psoas from his groin up over his hip. The dove back down and were firmer, more sure and eager as she touched everywhere surrounding his opening. He panted, “Bulma…the suspense is kind of killing me.”

Piccolo sat up on his elbows so he could see better, and Vegeta stared into his eyes as his hands did exactly as Piccolo imagined. Bulma wasn’t wearing a bra, so her nipples were visible as Vegeta handled her breasts almost roughly, but not quite. A soft moan escaped her and she said, “Oh fuck…”

Piccolo, opened up for the exam, whimpered as she slid two fingers inside him, tracing them along the edges where the speculum didn’t block her. Piccolo resisted the urge to push his hips toward that gentle touch. He needed more than that.

Vegeta growled, “Deeper, woman, how do you expect to get him off like that? Would that satisfy your pussy?”

Bulma laughed and Vegeta kissed the side of her neck. Burning, acidic jealousy almost ate through Piccolo’s pleasure until Vegeta whispered, “Isn’t he beautiful? Isn’t it the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen?” to Bulma and it was so soft and quiet, Piccolo knew it wasn’t for him. Vegeta was actually enjoying having someone to share with, like finally getting to show Piccolo off satisfied some deep urge of Vegeta’s.

“He is…I’ve never felt anything like this,” Bulma said. Her fingers grew more bold, but Piccolo wasn’t sure he could come pried open as he was. 

Vegeta leaned over her more, his hand ran down her arm, and joined her fingers inside Piccolo. He met Piccolo’s eyes and said to her, “Touch him like this, that’s what he likes,” and Vegeta pulsed his fingers on top of Bulma’s at the same time as he slid them a little. 

“Baby, are you sure you want me to come like this?” Piccolo said. The sensation of having both of them inside him had Piccolo on the very edge of his pleasure.

Vegeta stared into Piccolo’s eyes and said, “Can I make her come while you come?”

Bulma laughed, maybe a little nervously and said, “I don’t think that’s really…um…possible…”

Piccolo gave her his lopsided smile that she said she liked, and said, “Bulma, Vegeta can’t turn down a challenge like that.”

Vegeta kissed down her neck more and Piccolo watched as Vegeta’s hand snaked off her breast, still beneath her shirt, and right into her pants. “V-V-Vegeta!” she spluttered, but her head lolled back and she gave Piccolo more stimulation. He grinned, she was clearly touching Piccolo like she liked to be touched. Vegeta knew it too, Piccolo heard it in his mind, and Vegeta sent the feeling of her hot, slippery folds to Piccolo, so he could enjoy it too. Vegeta’s deft fingers pressed and vibrated against her clit until she gasped and whimpered.

Bulma’s eyes were barely open as she moaned, “You close, honey, because you’re right…he…he does like a challenge.”

Vegeta’s smug, predatory smile set Piccolo off, and Vegeta growled, “Come for me, both of you, together!” Piccolo did, but managed to keep his eyes open enough to see Bulma in ecstasy, to feel what Vegeta’s fingers felt, the wet, pulsing and seizing of her pussy as Vegeta barely dipped inside her. Vegeta commanded her, “Look, watch him,” and Bulma obeyed. She and Vegeta stared inside Piccolo and it turned him on enough that his cock went off too and cum splattered his bare abdomen.

Her eyes flickered up to that sight, but darted back down to Piccolo’s sheath. “Baby, take…take the thing out…it’s…it’s like I can’t really finish with it inside me,” Piccolo pleaded because his orgasm felt unwhole. 

Vegeta whispered, “No, you just need your mate to really finish you.” Vegeta’s rough, skilled fingers, that knew Piccolo’s body better than Piccolo himself nudged Bulma’s fingers out of the way and just that, the touch of Vegeta’s flesh to Piccolo’s velvet interior was enough and Piccolo wailed as his _theadur_ really came and came hard.

“Holy shit,” Bulma said, her eyes focused and intrigued. “That’s insane. I want you to fuck him and pull out as soon as you guys come,” she said authoritatively and moved out of Vegeta’s way.

No one asked Piccolo, Vegeta just removed the speculum, pressed his mouth to Piccolo’s still-twitching sheath, and pulled his prick out. Piccolo stared into Vegeta’s eyes as Vegeta sank into him with a low, rumbling growl of pleasure. Vegeta said, “Gods, my heart, that was the hottest thing, I need you.”

Piccolo was speechless, but he nodded and fell back as Vegeta began to pound him, fucking him hard and rough, but reveling in the stirrups as his hands greedily took in all of Piccolo’s legs and his cock and his belly. Bulma watched and Piccolo saw the conflict on her face. He said, “You can touch yourself, Bulma.”

She met Piccolo’s eyes and he realized that wasn’t what she wanted, but they both seemed to sense that Vegeta wouldn’t want Piccolo’s prick in someone else. She nodded, but turned to Vegeta. “Can…can I touch myself while I jerk him off? I’ve never even touched a dick like his.”

“Didn’t give any Namek villagers hand-jobs while they were here?” Vegeta said with a smirk, but he never even paused or slowed from fucking Piccolo perfectly.

Bulma laughed and said, “I meant the size, but yeah, the species too.”

Vegeta said, “Have at it, woman, but pull your pants down so I can see.”

Piccolo’s body drowned out the screaming terror in his mind at what door they were opening. But then he wondered if this was how the boy came to be. Maybe they just…did this. Piccolo wondered if Bulma would willingly let Vegeta impregnate her so they could have a son. This was fun, and all three of them got along, there was no reason not to take advantage of the fact that she was likely fertile whereas Piccolo was not.

Vegeta heard Piccolo’s thoughts and his face was thoughtful, not upset, but that didn’t last long either as he spiraled into ecstasy, his eyes on Bulma’s small, calloused hand working Piccolo’s cock.

After all three of them came, Bulma panted, “Out of the way, Vegeta, I want to see!” She didn’t bother to pull her pants up as she shuffled around and inserted the speculum while Piccolo still twitched from the tail end of his orgasm. She cried, “Oh! Interesting! I might have to use a scope so we can try to film that, maybe if I can get a closer look I’ll be able to tell if there’s anything amiss!”

Piccolo listened as she explained what she’d seen and Vegeta looked so happy. So…hopeful. Piccolo wondered if it was because Vegeta thought she might fix Piccolo, or whether he’d just decided to impregnate Bulma so he could be done stressing about Piccolo’s barrenness.


	9. Expectations

Piccolo expected the threesome to just become the new normal after Bulma examined him, but it was as though neither Vegeta nor Bulma even _remembered_. Piccolo returned to hanging out with Bulma in her lab, clandestinely cleaning when she wasn’t paying attention to him. Vegeta returned to training and ranting about Goku. Bulma returned to the scientific problem at hand. The closest she came to even acknowledging the three of them playing doctor together was when she talked to Piccolo about her theories of _theadur_ function.

Piccolo felt like he was losing his mind. He thought about the threesome pretty constantly. He thought about the lavender-haired boy. He thought about losing his mate. Neither Vegeta nor Bulma seemed to worry or think about what he had revealed to them, and that only made Piccolo panic more. Of course they wouldn’t. They would both get what they wanted, while Piccolo would be left in despair and loneliness. He had to bury his fear and his hurt deep so that Vegeta didn’t sense it, because it only angered him when Piccolo brought up his concerns.

But every night when he got into bed with Vegeta, he forgot his worries. Vegeta was as passionate and loving as ever. If anything, the hope that Bulma’s examination had stoked seemed to make Vegeta randier than before, which Piccolo hadn’t really thought was a possibility. Every night, when Vegeta was spent and sexually sated and on the very edge of sleep, Piccolo poked around in his little mate’s mind, looking for any hint of his future betrayal, but Vegeta’s mind was cluttered with love for Piccolo, dreams of baby Saiyan-Namekian hybrids, and trouncing Goku. Nothing else. Bulma was nowhere to be found in Vegeta’s mind.

Bulma grew more frustrated with her inability to solve the issue. Piccolo’s exam didn’t reveal anything that she could immediately identify as wrong. Weeks passed and Piccolo began to wonder if she _did_ think about the threesome and she was putting off examining Vegeta because of it. What if Vegeta had something they could fix? Even though Piccolo very much wanted to be pregnant, to be the one to carry their child, Vegeta carrying it was better than their awful barrenness. Piccolo wanted to have _something_ they could maybe try to solve their problem. Vegeta’s physical examination was their last hope.

After more weeks, Piccolo finally caved to his own misery about his sterility. “Bulma…” he said, once again flopped on his back in his usual spot on her countertop.

“Hmm?” she said absently, her fingers flying over her keyboard.

“Why haven’t you examined Vegeta?” Piccolo asked.

“Oh, uh, well…I kept thinking I would figure something out with you. You want to be the carrier, right? The pregnant one?” she said. She was distracted. She had taken blood samples from both of them the previous week and he knew she was doing some gene-sequencing work that seemed to hold her attention longer than most projects.

“Well…yeah…but I’d rather _he_ be pregnant than neither of us. We’re running out of time before the androids and the last thing I want is for one of us to be pregnant when they show up, especially him, because despite what the kid said about Goku saving everything, I think we’ll need Vegeta too,” Piccolo said. He stayed laying down. Piccolo didn’t want to see Bulma’s expression.

“Okay, I’m almost done with this. Talk to Vegeta and I’ll do his exam after lunch. Are we gonna do what we did last time?” she said as casually as if she were asking if they’d played a game of cards or had dessert together during Piccolo’s exam.

“Do…do you want to do it again? You…you haven’t breathed a word about it, so I kinda figured you got me out of your system, at least,” Piccolo said, shrugging, even though he had no idea if she was looking at him.

Then she was above him, staring down at him, her hands on her hips. “You know, you’re my best friend, right? We hang out _all_ the time. Why do you keep acting like it wasn't about you too?”

“Oh come on, Bulma, I know I’m just a big, green addendum to the main, delicious Saiyan agenda. I get it, you’re human, it makes sense you’d be attracted to a human-looking alien who is also jacked and hot and hung. I’m not…not…I don’t know…It doesn’t _offend_ me or something,” Piccolo said, and paused to think, “I just…I know it’s the two of you, you know, that make stuff happen. So I know that you’ll have sex with him. It’s—“

“You stupid jerk! Just because in some scenario I had sex with him and got pregnant doesn’t mean I’m in love with him, you idiot. So what if he’s hot, Picc? You are too! But you’re also fun, and interesting, and kind, and you’re a really good listener, and you’re great with kids…you’re just…look, I know you two are mated, and I’m…I’m trying to be respectful of that, but it’s hard for me to pretend I don’t have feelings for you!” Bulma shouted.

Piccolo’s eyes hurt they were bugging out so much. “Bulma…I…sorry,” Piccolo said and sat up so he could hug her, unsure whether it would make her feel better or worse. “We’ll have to ask Vegeta, you know? I…I’m just scared, Bulma. I love him so much that it’s terrifying that I’m going to lose him—“

“You’re not going to lose him, for fuck’s sake! The man adores you. He may want to fuck me, but that’s different, and you know it is. You big fucking dope, don’t you get that even if you and I both want to fuck Vegeta, and Vegeta maybe wants to fuck me and _definitely_ loves fucking you, he only _loves_ you and I _love_ you on top of wanting to fuck you, so maybe you could just settle down!” Bulma yelled.

Piccolo’s eyebrows shot up. “Um…But…Okay, but like, love like a friend, right?”

“What? No! Are you listening to _anything_ I say? Picc, we have been hanging out daily for the better part of three fucking years! How can you be this fucking daft?! Are you Goku?”

“Don’t be mean! I just…I thought I was like, your gay best friend, you know…like on TV,” Piccolo said, his stomach roiling with this new and confusing information.

“You are my gay best friend! My hot, sexy, sweet, gay best friend!” Bulma said and her eyes filled, “That’s why I find it stressful!”

“Find what stressful?” Piccolo said. He needed clarification, because there were lots of stressful things in her confession.

“Loving you. Wanting to fuck you, my best friend. Wanting to fuck my best friend’s mate. Wanting to help you guys have a baby but also just…just…just wanting! Gods. It’s _all_ fucking stressful,” Bulma said and flopped back in her desk chair. She held her face in her hands and Piccolo could hear her trying to breathe through tears.

“I’m really sorry, Bulma. I…I don’t have to hang out. And you don’t have to work on it anymore. I don’t want to make you stressed and miserable. I know you’re going way above and beyond by trying to help with this. I appreciate all you’ve done, but I’m not like him. I know you’re brilliant, but I don't think there’s a fix, Bulma. So you don’t have to do anything else. You’ve done enough. I don’t want to torture—“

“Fuck you! I’m a godsdamned genius and I _will_ figure this out! And everything else…I don't know. I’ll get over it. I knew from the beginning what I was getting into,” Bulma said, but her pretty blue eyes met Piccolo’s with hope. Just like Vegeta, she hoped. Piccolo never thought of himself as jaded, but these two had made him feel like a complete cynic.

“Woman, why is my mate distressed? What have you done?” Vegeta growled as he burst into the lab.

“Kinda slow on the jump, aren’t you, Vegeta? He’s been distressed for a while,” she said, obviously teasing him. Maybe flirting. Piccolo couldn’t untangle any of their interactions anymore. “You ready for me to examine you. I think we’ll have to do a scope for your ass, not a speculum, so I guess you’ll have to do an enema.”

Bulma and Piccolo almost passed out laughing after they explained what an enema was to a very unhappy Vegeta. He took care of business with much grumbling. Afterwards, Bulma walked him through what they would do and Vegeta complained more, “This seems less hot than what we did with Piccolo.”

“Well, yeah…” Bulma said and met Piccolo’s eyes.

Piccolo rolled them and said, “Well, we could always do something hot afterward, if you two want, after like a month of pretending we _didn’t_ have a threesome. Could we do it not on a fucking exam table this time?”

Both Bulma and Vegeta gawked at him. He slumped and said, “Look, can we all stop pretending that it didn’t happen? It’s freaking me out even more that you both try to act like nothing happened. I don’t know what to do about it. And maybe…I don’t know…maybe we can just…just knock Bulma up, but the baby can be ours, you know?” Piccolo said and wanted to stuff the words back in his mouth. He had just willingly offered his mate up to her. What if that wasn’t enough? What if she stole him entirely?

Piccolo didn’t even glance at Bulma, he stared, searching and terrified, into Vegeta’s eyes. Vegeta’s voice came in his mind, _Do you mean that,_ minaiya _? I’m not…opposed…but I’m also content to keep trying with you. If you want to fuck around with the woman for fun, that’s fine, but this…this is another matter._

Piccolo said, _I know, baby. I…I think the infertility stuff is breaking me. I…We could just try with her, right? If she’s willing? Then—_

“Hey, you two, not cool. You can’t telepathically talk about me right in front of me after dropping a bomb like that, Picc,” Bulma snapped.

Vegeta glowered and said, “Piccolo is fucking _mine_ , and if you want me to _share_ , you better back the fuck off, woman. I am grateful that you’ve done all you’ve done, but he is _mine_.”

Bulma got in Vegeta’s face and said, “Yeah, no shit! But you’re only upsetting him by pretending that there’s no potential for you to knock me up! We saw him! We saw the boy! So could we all three of us talk about me maybe giving you guys a baby!? It’s pretty fucked up not to include the _uterus_ in that discussion!”

“I wasn’t even talking about that! I was just…just…just reassuring him! If that’s what Piccolo wants, that’s what we’ll do, but I don’t…I don’t want him to think it’s _necessary_ ,” Vegeta said, and to Piccolo’s surprise, his eyes filled with tears. “He’s enough for me. And I won’t have you continue to try to snipe him by stoking his insecurities about you and I fucking just so you can have him!”

“You dumb asshole! I want you both! And I _do_ want to help you! I don’t _stoke_ his insecurities!” Bulma shouted.

Piccolo groaned. It was all so complicated. He barked, “Shut up! Shut up both of you! All we know is that you two fuck in some manner and have a baby! A perfect baby boy who grows into a strong young man who can cut Frieza down like a fucking straw man. So…just…” Piccolo paused, panting for breath he was so despondent. He tried to stay his tears, but he couldn’t. He collapsed in a heap against one of the few uncluttered spaces against the wall of Bulma’s lab.

Vegeta wrapped his small, powerful body around Piccolo, murmuring reassurances in Saiyan as he kissed Piccolo’s skull. He brushed his forehead against Piccolo’s antennae, pouring his love and concern into Piccolo so forcefully that Piccolo got hard. He laughed snottily through his heaving sobs. “Stop that, baby.”

Vegeta shoved himself into Piccolo’s lap, grinding on him, and purred, “No, I’d rather put it to use. Do you want the woman too, or not? If she’s going to have our baby, I think we both ought to try to get her pregnant.” Vegeta turned to Bulma and said, “If you wish for this…physical…relationship, I have no problem with that. If you’re willing to give us a baby, I would be eternally grateful. But that’s all it will be, woman. I don’t want you to have any illusion about what it will be. I don’t want you to think you’ll have him, because he’s fucking _mine_.”

Piccolo let his eyes drift up to Bulma’s. Bulma searched his and said, “I…Look…I don’t want a baby, but…I…I would have one for you two. But…maybe…I don’t know, can we…can we have fun? For a while? Until…Until it’s run its course?”

Vegeta got up off Piccolo and approached her. He stared into her eyes and said, “I mean it. He is mine, and I will _kill_ you if you try to take him from me. And don’t have this baby if you don’t intend to give it to us. It will be my baby with Piccolo, regardless of whose womb grows it. Do you understand? Do you mean that? Please think on it before you commit to that, woman. There’s no need to decide now, as I’m sure we can all have a good time without putting an ounce of semen in you.”

Bulma blushed a deep red and Piccolo chuckled. She stood up straighter though and said, “No. I’ve decided. I know how badly you both want your baby. And Piccolo’s my best friend. I’m nervous about being pregnant and stuff, but I don’t want a kid right now anyway, so it’s all yours. Maybe this is where the boy came from anyway, Picc. Maybe there’s no timeline where anything romantic happened between me and Vegeta, maybe I was always just a surrogate for you guys, but since you both died, I raised the baby as my own?”

Piccolo found that possibility strangely comforting. He shamelessly dived into Vegeta’s mind, rooting around in all the deepest corners, but the closest thing he found to Bulma, caring for Bulma, was a fear that she would take Piccolo away from him. Piccolo started cackling at that and Vegeta furrowed his brow. He was tired today, and hadn’t noticed that Piccolo was rummaging in his mind.

“What…what are you laughing about?” Vegeta said, his eyes darting to Bulma. Bulma shrugged.

Piccolo said, “Vegeta, you’re adorable. I love…I love you so much.”

Now Bulma and Vegeta exchanged a confused glance. Piccolo said in his mind, _You think you could ever lose me, to anyone? You’re my only, forever._

Vegeta scowled and said, _Why do you think you could lose me but find it absurd that I could lose you?_

Piccolo considered this, but only crossed his arms tightly and stared at his mate. Vegeta arched a brow at Piccolo and said, “Well? Are we going to fuck the woman until she can’t walk or what?”

Bulma flushed again and chuckled, a little nervously, Piccolo thought. He said, “Jeez, Bulma, we’re not actually going to hurt you. Just a figure of speech.”

“Yeah…I know…just…whoa. I’ve…I mean…I’m…um…” Bulma stammered.

Piccolo canted his head to the side and his eyes widened and he said, “Oh man, are you a _virgin_?”

“What!? I mean…no…not…well…not…not technically.”

Piccolo’s smile was helpless. Bulma always talked a pretty good game so he assumed she was dating on the sly. “What does _that_ mean?”

“I mean…I’ve…I’ve had…well…it…sort of? It’s not like I’ve never done _anything_ , but…it just…we…I was with Yamcha on and off and so…so I didn’t…experiment much,” Bulma said and her flush crept down onto the top of her breasts where they peeked out of her tank top.

“Wow, Bulma, you just jumped from making out with Yamcha to a threesome with two aliens?” Piccolo teased, hoping to put his best friend at ease.

“I just didn’t…really…want to…with him,” Bulma said.

“Yeah, I get that. But you do…with us?” Piccolo said. Vegeta watched it all like a wildlife biologist taking field notes.

“Are you just insecure and that’s why you keep making me say it, Picc? Jeez! Yes! I want you to fuck me, I want Vegeta to fuck me, and I _really_ like watching you two fuck.”

Piccolo chortled as Vegeta got hard just from Bulma’s words. Piccolo hopped up and wrapped around Vegeta from behind, sliding his hand into Vegeta’s tight training shorts. He kissed Vegeta’s ear and murmured, “You like hearing about that, huh, baby? Or are you just thinking about fucking me to kick things off? Or maybe letting me fuck you. Bulma hasn’t seen that yet. I wonder if she might like that?”

Bulma’s chest rose and fell fast now. Vegeta thrust his prick up into Piccolo’s hand as he reached up over his head to clutch at Piccolo, turning his face so they could kiss each other over his shoulder. He murmured in Saiyan, “ _You are my only. Always. This changes nothing._ ”

“ _Vk karam oon, vku-aiya._ ” _I love you, my soul._ Piccolo whispered the Saiyan against Vegeta’s lips as he curled over his little mate. It was strange that he didn’t even care if Bulma was there or with them, touching them, fucking them, Vegeta was the axis of his world and nothing would change that, ever. He smiled and kissed his mate more deeply. “We’re gonna have a baby, baby.”

Vegeta grinned too, but Piccolo didn’t think it reached his eyes. It occurred to Piccolo that maybe he was only doing this to acquiesce to Piccolo. That Piccolo with his worries and anxiety about infertility was actually the only reason that strong, lavender-haired boy existed at all.


	10. Failures

Bulma oozed into their lives. Piccolo spent time with her most days anyway, so the fact that he now spent nights with her occasionally too didn’t feel jarring to Piccolo. At first Vegeta tried to kick her out after the three of them would have sex, including the first time, when Vegeta went full mate-crazy and Piccolo had to fuck him into post-orgasmic calm, which Bulma watched. Her eyes were fiery with lust, but also scientific fascination.

She continued her research into their infertility. Piccolo thought her frustration had lessened once the three of them started fucking. Piccolo wondered anxiously if that meant she had given up now that she knew she would give them a son. Vegeta also seemed more at ease and Piccolo felt in his mind that his little mate had been stressed about Piccolo and Bulma. Now that it was out in the open, it was something of a relief for Vegeta.

Vegeta sniffed out Bulma’s heats, but he didn’t refuse her when she wasn’t in heat. He also didn’t allow her unequivocal rights to them to the point that Bulma finally told them that if they wanted her, they could come to her room, rather than her getting kicked out of theirs when Vegeta was feeling mate-crazy.

Piccolo rarely got mate-crazy, but they eventually realized that when Bulma pegged Vegeta while Vegeta sucked Piccolo off, it led inevitably to Piccolo going mate-crazy. So Vegeta said he would just have to fuck Piccolo when Bulma pegged him. Piccolo didn’t mind, Vegeta still gave him plenty of head.

The first few months, the majority of their sex-life was still just the two of them. The thought of either doing anything alone with Bulma never crossed their minds until one night, after Vegeta had to be fucked out of mate-crazies again, Bulma said, “Gods, maybe we need to do different pairs every now and again. Like Piccolo can fuck me one night, you can fuck me the next, then all three of us. Your crazies are so unpredictable, Vegeta.”

Piccolo shamelessly snooped in his little mate’s mind as he pondered Bulma’s suggestion. “You can have him during the day if he wishes. But if I find out you’re pressuring him, I’ll end you, woman, despite your uterus,” Vegeta said, laying back in the bed, stroking his cock lazily. He yanked Piccolo down beside him and kissed him deeply. “Only if you want her, my heart.”

Piccolo felt only Vegeta’s desire to please him, nothing else. Piccolo murmured, “And you two?”

“I’ll leave that up to you, my mate,” Vegeta said with a shrug and flipped Piccolo onto his back. Vegeta sucked and kissed down Piccolo’s body, until he reached his sheath. He drove his tongue inside Piccolo. Vegeta’s tongue was as magical as ever.

Piccolo arched against him and said, “You want to sit on my face, Bulma?”

Bulma looked warily at Vegeta. Piccolo rolled his eyes and said, “You two can fuck or whatever, whenever. Maybe your sperm are shy and you can’t knock her up with me in the room.” 

Bulma and Vegeta laughed. Vegeta slithered up Piccolo’s body and kissed him. He growled, “Can I fuck you while you taste the woman?”

“Of course, baby, I want you to fuck me,” Piccolo said and caressed his little mate’s face. Vegeta’s sadness about their barrenness echoed louder some days than others and he was sad this morning. He was giving up. He was giving in, too, to their new way of life with Bulma. Piccolo didn’t know what to feel about anything, because he was falling in love with Bulma, but it was so different from what he felt for Vegeta, that he didn’t know what to do about it.

Vegeta brushed his forehead over Piccolo’s antennae, reassuring him, and plunged slowly inside Piccolo’s sheath. He kissed Piccolo more before he shifted more upright and picked up Bulma. She squealed and laughed. Vegeta growled, “Bend your legs, woman, don’t keep my mate waiting.”

Vegeta enjoyed teasing Piccolo about his newly acquired taste for pussy. Piccolo hadn’t been with a woman until Bulma, and despite the numerous nights they’d had threesomes, he still hadn’t technically fucked her. Vegeta worried about it happening and not happening in irritating turns, like tinnitus in Piccolo’s mind. Now Vegeta said, “Eat her pussy, my heart, but once she comes, I want to watch your cock slide into her.”

Piccolo and Bulma both gaped at Vegeta. Vegeta thrust languidly into Piccolo and said, “I don’t care that the future boy was mine, he changed shit by coming back. Our threesomes are the only way that Bulma has a child by us, and I want you to try too, Piccolo. The woman wants you to try, she’s just too shy to say so.”

Piccolo’s eyes snapped to Bulma’s. She was poised above him, still on her knees, and though his tongue was flexible and stretchy enough he could eat her out like this, and had when Vegeta took her doggy-style, he wanted her on his face. She stared down at him over her beautiful breasts. She smiled and said, “I do want you to fuck me, Picc. I’m not shy…just…I don’t know…I know you’ve never been with a woman before.”

She sat back on his belly while Vegeta continued to fuck Piccolo. Piccolo ran one hand up and down and her thigh, the other up and down Vegeta’s behind her. His hand on Bulma slid up over her soft ass onto her waist, smaller than Vegeta’s even, Piccolo’s hand spanned its narrow expanse. He brushed up her flank and cupped her breast. He brushed his thumb back and forth over her nipple and smirked up at her. “I think it’s hilarious that you’re worried about me being with a woman when you are literally having sex with two different species of aliens from space.”

Bulma threw her head back and laughed, slapping his pec playfully. She curled down to kiss him as he moved his other hand off Vegeta. He lifted her up, held her in the air, and said, “I still want to lick your pussy a little, beautiful.”

Bulma gasped when Piccolo set her down above his mouth. Unhinging his jaw was useful with pussy because it meant he could keep his mouth entirely over her clit while thrusting into her with his tongue. Bulma, for all her concern about Piccolo having never been with a woman, never hesitated for him to go down on her. He could get Bulma off in seconds when he chose to do so, but he liked lingering over her slick folds, tasting as she got more and more excited for him. She twitched already and he pulled off to purr, “You excited to take my big cock, beautiful?”

She nodded and ran the side of her index fingers along the underside of Piccolo’s antennae. He grinned against her pussy and murmured, “Don’t do that. With Vegeta in my sheath and you on my face, I’ll come in like two seconds.” 

Vegeta laid down on Piccolo’s torso, sliding his hands over Bulma’s thighs, and the two of them fondled his antennae together. Vegeta nibbled on Bulma’s ass and she gasped and writhed on Piccolo. She groaned, “Honey, I want to make you come so I can ride you. I want you to come and then come again inside me. Vegeta will just keep fucking you, right, bad man?”

“Gods, yes, woman, I’ll fuck him forever,” Vegeta growled.

Piccolo had both Bulma’s breasts in his hands now, pinching and tugging her nipples with his thumb and forefinger. He still found Bulma’s squishy, supple body intriguing. She was soft everywhere. Her pussy was soft and pliant, taking even Vegeta’s big prick with ease. Her breasts were heavy and filled his hands perfectly. Her waist, slender like Vegeta’s, was completely different to touch than the hot steel of every inch of Vegeta. It scared Piccolo that he could no longer imagine having just one or the other.

Piccolo decided that two (or three) could play the race-to-climax game. He twisted her nipples a little and pushed his tongue inside her to her g-spot, tapping on it with the tip, while the base ground against her clit. He pulsed chi through the length of his tongue and by the third pulse, Bulma was shuddering and screaming his name. Her pussy gripped and clenched on his tongue. Piccolo moaned, retracted it, and lapped at her a final few times, squeezing her breasts. He slid his hands down onto her ass and said, “You sure, beautiful?”

“Yes, fuck me, honey. Fuck me while I’m still coming. Fuck me hard!” Bulma gasped.

Vegeta slapped her ass and said, “There’s a good girl. Lean forward, I want to watch him slide inside you.” 

Piccolo looked into Bulma’s eyes as he moved her. Vegeta aligned Piccolo’s cock as he sat up to get out of the way, still rolling his hips into Piccolo in the slow, sensuous way they often made love just the two of them. Vegeta held his hands over Piccolo’s as they lowered her down onto Piccolo’s prick. She gasped and the moment her head lolled back, Piccolo’s eyes found his mate’s.

Vegeta lifted his gaze from Piccolo’s cock driving up into Bulma. In his mind, Piccolo heard his little mate’s rumbling voice, _You are still my only. My mate. My true love. I’ll take care of you forever, Piccolo._ Piccolo smiled at his mate and Vegeta squeezed his hands. Together they moved Bulma and she groaned as Piccolo pushed up into her more. It was a slow process as they still hadn’t had much sex with her, so she was tight and unused to Piccolo’s length and girth. 

Bulma started to ride him once she adjusted and Piccolo let himself enjoy the novel, dual sensation of getting fucked while fucking. Bulma was beautiful. Her breasts bounced as she slammed herself down on him faster, but his eyes were drawn helplessly to his mate. Vegeta’s eyes burned for him, and though he didn’t speak more in Piccolo’s mind, a steady stream of lust and love radiated so loudly from Vegeta, that Piccolo felt himself coming before Bulma.

“Fuck…Bulma…Vegeta…you two are making me come,” Piccolo groaned.

Vegeta swatted Bulma’s ass gently and said, “Come on my mate, woman. I know his prick feels amazing inside you.”

“Vegeta, fuck!” Bulma cried out, and she obeyed him. One of the more fascinating aspects of their new triangular relationship was that Bulma seemed as incapable of resisting Vegeta’s orgasmic commands as Piccolo was.

Piccolo pulsed up into her clenching, gripping pussy, its lubricant so different than what Piccolo produced with his magic. She was so wet that it dripped down Piccolo’s prick, now mixed with his cum. Vegeta roared and bashed into Piccolo, reaching a hand around Bulma’s belly and up onto her breast. He teased her nipple as he fucked Piccolo savagely. Piccolo felt his mate’s seed fill him and he trembled. Piccolo lived for that feeling, for Vegeta’s cum to pour into him, allowing a brief moment of euphoria and hope. 

The hope always died. Fucking Bulma didn’t change that, and Piccolo’s high was short-lived. Bulma curled down and kissed him. She whispered, “I love you, Piccolo.”

Piccolo met her eyes, then searched Vegeta’s. Vegeta said, “It isn’t as though this wasn’t completely predictable. You’re very lovable.”

Piccolo whispered in Vegeta’s mind, _But what if I love her back, baby_?

“I expected you would, you’re also very loving. You can at least speak aloud to her when your prick is still inside her, my heart,” Vegeta said with a little smirk.

Piccolo turned to Bulma and caressed her jaw. “I love you too, beautiful.”

Bulma flushed and smiled and said, “You do?”

“Yeah, and like, love-love, not straight-best-friend, love.”

She laughed and hugged him tighter, sighing as she relaxed on his chest. Vegeta was already palming her ass, giving it a squeeze with a hungry growl. He bent and kissed her spine, murmuring, “If you ever fall in love with me, woman, perhaps you’ll let me break in your ass so my mate and I can fuck you at the same time.”

Bulma looked over her shoulder and said, “I already love you, you dope. Gods, Vegeta. You’re so weird.”

“Is that a yes on me fucking your ass?”

“No, not right now. I’m tired. But in general, yes. I might just die mid-orgasm if I have both of you inside me,” Bulma said and laughed. “Gods, my parents asked me if the three of us were ‘a couple’ the other day. I hope it’s okay that I said we were. It seemed easier than saying I was attempting to get knocked up and happened to fall in love with both of you.”

Vegeta said, “This love changes nothing, woman.”

“I know, I know, Piccolo’s your mate, blah blah blah. Can I just enjoy myself while trying to get knocked up and have a baby for you, Vegeta?”

Vegeta eased out of Piccolo. “Can you? Or is the love going to complicate things? It’s going to be _our_ baby. I’m done if that isn’t still the agreement. I’m allowing him to love you and you to love him, but I’ll fight for what’s mine, woman. And Piccolo is _mine_.” Vegeta’s voice was fierce, his chi soaring.

Piccolo placed a hand on his perfect, taut ass, and said, “Baby, no mate-crazies right now. Bulma’s doing us so many favors, don’t be a dick.”

Vegeta stared at Bulma a long time and nodded. He got up, cleaned up, and said, “Are we staying with her tonight, my heart?”

Piccolo looked back and forth between the two people he loved. He hated that he would throw Bulma over in a heartbeat for Vegeta, but he also didn’t want to do that. He wanted to be able to love them both. He waved Vegeta over and pulled him down into a kiss. He brushed his antennae over Vegeta’s forehead and Vegeta relaxed on one side of Piccolo. Bulma was already cleaning up and getting ready for bed, and before Piccolo knew it, he had a lover asleep under each arm. Sleep eluded Piccolo, though, and after a long night fretting, the sun rose, and he slipped out of bed, leaving Vegeta to wrap around Bulma as they both stayed asleep.

* * *

More time passed and Piccolo’s despair returned. Bulma remained stubbornly unpregnant to the point that he wondered if she was using birth control. When he finally approached her she said, “You piece of shit! How dare you!? I’m trying, okay?! I would think _you_ at least would be sympathetic to how stressful it can be when you’re trying to get pregnant and _can’t_.”

The statement wounded Piccolo. In Piccolo’s heart of hearts, he still desperately wanted to get pregnant and every time Vegeta pointed out the way that the future boy had changed the past by visiting it, Piccolo willed his womb to bear fruit, to be one of the things that the boy’s time-meddling changed. But it didn’t. And Bulma’s didn’t either.

Piccolo said nothing when Bulma redid her room, bringing in a bigger bed, expanding the closet to have space for all of the Earth clothes she bought for Vegeta that he rarely wore except when they made him. She remodeled her bathroom. Workmen installed an enormous, custom-made three-person tub long enough for Piccolo to actually lounge. Three sinks were laid into the lengthened countertop. The bigger shower now had a large bench, multiple heads, and one was higher than the others. Higher than Piccolo. Her room was like a metaphor for their ever-changing, ever-entwining relationship.

Vegeta mostly sailed along without incident. Piccolo knew from his shameless snooping that Vegeta, after each new thing entrenching Bulma in their lives, panicked. Then he calmed down, reminding himself that they were having fun. He loved Bulma too, now, and wanted the baby almost as desperately as Piccolo. But the three sinks pushed him over the edge into a wild bout of mate-crazies.

“You fucking _bitch_! You _mate-thieving_ bitch! I knew it! I knew you would take him from me! I knew you weren’t going to have a child for us, you just wanted _my mate_!”

Bulma grew more fearless with every day the threesome became the new normal. She got right in Vegeta’s face and hissed, “Maybe you both shoot blanks! Maybe our genetics aren’t compatible! You _asshole_! I love you too and I am _trying_ to have your baby, so stop being a fucking _prick_!”

“Then stop…stop…stop taking ownership of us! Look at…at…at what you’ve done! You’ve completely rearranged our life to fit in yours! You…You…You clearly intend to keep him!” Vegeta snarled.

Piccolo stepped in with a sigh. “Baby, come on. Let’s go to our room and cool off. Bulma’s just trying to make it comfortable for us. We’re here every night. You love her. I love her. Settle the fuck down. It’ll be okay.”

“I’m just having fun and trying to have your baby, you stupid jerk, but I can still enjoy it while it lasts, right? I don’t have to keep watching Piccolo squat in the shower to rinse off, or try to share a sink with your broad fucking shoulders?” Bulma said, her tone pleading despite her angry words.

“No. No, I am fucking done. This needs to stop. You aren’t pregnant yet and it’s clearly not working. I can’t do it. I can’t share him anymore,” Vegeta said, shaking his head.

Piccolo was surprised. Really surprised. Vegeta loved Bulma, genuinely loved her, so he didn’t know where this was coming from. “Baby? What’s going on?”

“She…she’s stealing you! You love her more!” Vegeta said and collapsed into anguished tears.

Piccolo wrapped an arm under Vegeta’s ass and picked him up so he could kiss him more easily. “No, baby, she’s not. I’ll always love you. You’re always my mate. I love her too, but that doesn’t mean anything about how I feel about you. Settle down, okay? You want to go have a night with just the two of us?”

Vegeta nodded and Piccolo shot Bulma a sympathetic look. Bulma looked antsy, like Vegeta’s bid to end things might sway Piccolo. And it would. If Vegeta made him choose, he would choose Vegeta. He would always choose Vegeta. His love for Vegeta was so all-consuming it wasn’t even a choice.


	11. Reunions

Piccolo and Vegeta stayed away from Bulma for about a month. It was a year until the androids would arrive and Vegeta’s training was obsessive. Which left Piccolo a lot of time alone. Time which he knew he should not spend with Bulma. So he didn’t. He saw her, of course, and Piccolo was surprised how unaffected she seemed by Vegeta ending their ongoing threesome.

One day Vegeta came home from training in a snit that he still wasn’t super-Saiyan. Piccolo reclined on their balcony reading, having trained most of the day with Gohan and Goku, and subsequently realized that he was pretty pointless in the fight. Vegeta didn’t even greet him, he tore off Piccolo’s pants, shoved his legs apart, and pressed his mouth to Piccolo’s sheath.

Piccolo was used to Vegeta coping with stress this way, and he didn’t mind. The urgency and the hunger drove him crazy. He moaned and tilted his hips up to give his mate better access. Vegeta stroked Piccolo’s cock to life and smeared the his pre-cum around. He growled, “I want the woman too. Let’s go. She’s in heat.”

Vegeta ripped the rest of Piccolo’s clothes off, seated him on Vegeta’s hips, and flew to Bulma’s balcony. He pounded on her door. She came out, already in her pajamas (something Vegeta teased her ruthlessly about), and said, “Hey guys…”

Vegeta held Piccolo to the side and cupped her jaw, kissing her. “I’m sorry,” he whispered and kissed her back into the room.

“What?” Bulma said, taken aback. Vegeta rarely said those two words to her without some sort of qualification.

Vegeta said, “I’m sorry. I miss you. He misses you. Can we come back?”

“Yeah, I—“ Bulma started to speak, but Vegeta cut her off with his mouth.

He shredded her pajamas and tossed her on the bed. Piccolo could smell her arousal, hear her pulse soar, and Vegeta tossed him next. Piccolo knew it must have been a particularly frustrating day if he needed both of them immediately like this. Vegeta shucked his own clothes and crawled onto the big bed between them.

He sucked Piccolo’s cock and started fingering him roughly. A good kind of rough, like he might fist Piccolo if Piccolo begged. He paused sucking Piccolo to shove Bulma’s legs apart and flattened his tongue on her clit as he pushed two fingers inside her. He murmured, “Can I fuck you? I want to fuck you while he fucks me. Then I want you to peg me while I fuck him. Yes?”

Bulma nodded wordlessly, spreading her legs wider.

Vegeta shifted to kiss Piccolo and said, “Yes?”

“Yeah, sure, baby,” Piccolo said. He decided he could at least choose the position. He laid Vegeta on his back, slicking his cock with lube. “You seem like you want it now, huh, baby?”

“Yes, yes, yes. Hurry, both of you,” Vegeta said in a throaty voice.

Piccolo sat on his haunches and thrust into Vegeta hard. He pounded him a few times, Vegeta’s cries getting louder every time Piccolo hit his prostate. Piccolo gasped, “Bulma, get the nipple clamps, I want a handle on you.”

Bulma’s eyes lit up and she hurried to their bedside table. She screwed the little vises on her nipples, moaning as she did, and then fingered herself a little, watching Piccolo fuck into Vegeta. Piccolo shifted his panting mate’s knees over the crooks of his elbows, and said, “Ride him like this, Bulma, facing me. I want to play with your tits.”

She happily obliged and Vegeta palmed her ass as she straddled him. He groaned and thrust up into her, his asshole tightening on Piccolo so much that Piccolo almost came. Bulma slammed herself down on Vegeta’s cock and once they’d all adjusted to their positions, Piccolo shoved one of Vegeta’s legs up on his shoulder, and gave Bulma’s nipple clamp chain a gentle tug. He licked the taut, flat top of her nipples where they thrust forward from the clamps. Bulma’s high-pitched cries were already driving Piccolo crazy when combined with Vegeta’s ass gripping him in time with his thrusts into Bulma.

“Fuck, baby, you feel so good when you’re fucking Bulma,” Piccolo groaned and gave another few tugs on Bulma’s chain until she was screaming.

She clawed at Vegeta’s thighs and he slapped her ass. “Woman, are you going to come on my cock? Are you going to milk me so my ass can give my mate what he needs?” Vegeta growled.

Piccolo could feel the humming distress of Vegeta trying to interpret his deep, undying love for his mate, but his tender, fierce love of Bulma. Piccolo gasped out, “For fuck’s sake, Vegeta, you can love us both. It’s okay.”

Vegeta cried out and Piccolo felt his mate’s orgasm spill into his mind. Piccolo came in response to his mate’s pleasure, the feel of his mate’s ass gripping him, but mostly in response to the bright, almost blinding love his mate poured into him. Piccolo’s insecurities ebbed and flowed since their threesome had started, but even though this was what he wanted, Vegeta needing Bulma like this brought them back like a high, fast tide. Vegeta reassured him telepathically, even as he reached for Bulma’s clit, circling his fingers until she slammed her mouth over Piccolo’s, moaning into the kiss as she came.

They rippled together for a long while, coming down off the highs of their climaxes. Bulma dismounted from Vegeta and went to pee, giving Piccolo a moment to curl down over his mate and kiss him. “Hey, baby, you okay?”

“Fuck yes, my heart. I…I needed you. I wanted her, but I needed you. I’ll always need you,” Vegeta purred and caressed Piccolo’s cheek. “I love you, my mate. My only.”

“I love you too, baby,” Piccolo whispered and eased out of Vegeta. Piccolo wasn’t sure why, but in his heart, he felt like something shifted, like Vegeta was at peace with their new situation. Piccolo hoped that maybe that shift would mean that Bulma would finally get pregnant. It was a bittersweet hope, because more than anything, Piccolo wished that _he_ were pregnant. That they could go back and survive, never lose that first sweet pregnancy. Piccolo loved Bulma, and he wanted her, but he knew everything would be more complicated now. 

* * *

After that they moved back into Bulma’s big suite, which they simply referred to as the big room, as it seemed to distress Vegeta less to have it be a general space, not a surrender to “the woman.” Piccolo preferred that because Vegeta was less anxious once they just agreed to stay there. Otherwise every evening was fraught with the decisions of who and how and when to fuck and where to sleep.

Sometimes after Bulma fell asleep, Piccolo and Vegeta would lay facing each other, Vegeta cradled in Piccolo’s big arms. Piccolo would let his antennae rest on Vegeta’s forehead until they fell asleep, just sharing with each other, loving one another, and in those sweet moments, Piccolo felt closest with his mate. At peace.

But moments with Bulma were sweet too. The three of them had a good time and they worked well together as a trio, Piccolo had to admit. Even Vegeta grudgingly admitted it. It felt natural and Piccolo thought more and more that it might be okay if Bulma just merged into their family completely, parenting with them if they ever got their long-hoped for baby.

A few weeks after Vegeta’s decision to go back to Bulma, Piccolo was going down on Bulma while Vegeta was out training late. In the renewed three-way, Vegeta seemed much more relaxed about Piccolo and Bulma doing things with just the two of them, and Vegeta sheepishly asked Piccolo if it bothered Piccolo if Vegeta and Bulma did things on their own. As far as Piccolo knew, Vegeta and Bulma never did, because Vegeta was always always always training, but Piccolo didn’t ask and he didn’t search for that in Vegeta’s mind.

For whatever reason, Vegeta especially liked watching Piccolo eat pussy, often fucking him doggy-style as he did so. Piccolo and Bulma also both liked that particular set-up, and they often got started to lure Vegeta home from training. Bulma smelled slightly different tonight. Piccolo’s sense of smell, while not as keen as Vegeta’s hound-like olfaction, was significantly better than a human’s. He didn’t want to say anything because he’d learned after the first time he mentioned her scent, that Bulma got self-conscious, apparently due to nonsense Yamcha had told her. Apparently Yamcha didn’t like going down on Bulma, a fact which baffled Piccolo even more than Vegeta. 

Vegeta tapped down, a complete wreck from the bots in the gravity room. They waved, but didn’t stop what they were doing. Vegeta always showered before joining them in bed, or he moved them onto the balcony, or the floor, or the special reenforced section of wall that Bulma had created to handle Vegeta or Piccolo fucking anybody against it. But never the bed since the night they'd taken Bulma back. He was always too sweaty and filthy for that.

So both Piccolo and Bulma squawked in surprise when Vegeta shouldered Piccolo out of the way and pressed his blood-streaked face into Bulma’s crotch. She groaned, as he went right to work. Piccolo was annoyed, but he kissed up her belly and sucked on her nipple, playing with the other. Vegeta growled, “On your back next to her, my mate. Now. Hurry. Fuck, I’m so close to coming.”

Piccolo, bewildered now, as well as annoyed, said, “The fuck, Vegeta? I was having a pretty good time down there and now I want to play with her tits. I’m not a fucking prop.”

Vegeta made an animal noise and he pulled out from between Bulma’s legs. He grabbed Piccolo by the hips and lifted him, his fiery gaze almost scared Piccolo. He said, “She’s pregnant, I would like to celebrate by fucking you stupid while I eat her pussy. Then you can eat her pussy while I fuck your ass. Then you can fuck my ass while I fuck her, and so on, until we’re spent. But I want my mate on my cock _now_.”

Piccolo and Bulma spluttered, almost in unison, “P-p-pregnant?”

“Yes! Did you two not know?” Vegeta said, looking bewildered himself. He flehmened for a moment, his eyes sliding shut. “I smelled it the moment I came out of the GR. Gods, my heart, we’re finally going to get our baby.”

Piccolo didn’t need any more incentives. He shoved Vegeta onto his back, picked up a giggling Bulma, kissed her fiercely, and set her on Vegeta’s face, but kept her facing Piccolo. Vegeta hummed happily and spread her wider, spitting on his hand as he murmured, “Can I finger your ass, woman?”

“Yeah, oh gods, you guys, I’m really close,” Bulma gasped.

Piccolo sat down on Vegeta’s dripping cock, taking his mate deeply inside his _theadur_. Piccolo’s heart thundered. Their baby. They were finally going to have their baby. And it was almost exactly when the boy said it would be. Perhaps there was no changing fate. Because in nine months, Piccolo would have his beautiful, strong baby boy, and he would raise him well no matter what strife came their way. Vegeta and Goku and Gohan would defeat the androids and Piccolo and Vegeta would finally get to be a family, to have a real life.

The warm excitement rippling out of Vegeta’s mind made Piccolo shiver. He kissed Bulma more, but something flashed in her eyes, a brief sadness. He cupped her breasts, twisting her nipples as he rode his little mate. He watched her beautiful face, kissing her occasionally, and wondered if she wished she weren’t pregnant so their threesome could go on forever. But she shook her head the slightest bit. Piccolo didn’t think Bulma was the type to want children ever, but certainly not now. She was just discovering her sexuality and she was still young.

Both Piccolo and Bulma cried out as Vegeta’s chi skyrocketed. His chi often went wild when they were having fun, but this felt different. Vegeta panted and groaned against Bulma’s pussy. Piccolo gripped his mate’s narrow waist and Vegeta’s hands spread on top of his as he moaned low in his throat, and chi roared through the room. Bulma screamed as the chi undoubtedly went zinging into her pussy. 

She came, her whole body shaking. Piccolo kissed her, cupping her jaw in his hand. But he pulled away as golden light rippled up from behind her. Piccolo cheered, “Baby! Holy shit! You went super-Saiyan!”

Bulma twisted around and congratulated Vegeta before turning back to Piccolo for a last kiss and flopping off Vegeta to the side. Piccolo collapsed down to kiss Vegeta and they came together, Vegeta’s cock somehow even larger, but also nearly vibrating. Piccolo’s orgasm wracked his body, taking it to the border of pain as he covered his bloody, filthy mate in cum. They kissed for a long while before Piccolo let his eyes return to Bulma.

Piccolo tried to get a read on her thoughts. Piccolo’s antennae refused to touch Bulma like that, to delve into her mind and share his own, and she had never asked. This was the first time he wished he could use them. He could never dig in Bulma’s psyche the way he could in Vegeta’s, but Bulma also usually spoke her mind. It was the usually that worried Piccolo. Because as she reached to squeeze Piccolo’s ass as he rode Vegeta through their aftershocks, he saw it again, the sadness. Or the regret. He wasn't sure, but it scared him. If Piccolo knew one thing about Bulma, it was that she got what she wanted. Bulma always got what she wanted, one way or another.


End file.
